The Legend of the Ice Crown Rumble
Dec 20, 2022 8:40:57 GMT
Kalvin "Kal" Dayspring and Xavier Lux like this
Post by Max Stone on Dec 20, 2022 8:40:57 GMT
T’was the week after Christmas and spirits were dire
Shaun Hart stole control with Osh dead in a fire
With no grown ups around, corruption ran free
The soul of the fed, seized by CCPE
But all was not hopeless and all was not lost
For there was a fire cutting into the frost
A rumble was coming with temps below zero
And the wrestling world was in need of a hero
One who was true and one who was right
The one who was here to end the long night
He came into town and made a huge splash
And now he was here to take out the trash
He walked through the castle, his eyes on the throne
The new King had arrived, his name was
Max Stone
Shaun Hart stole control with Osh dead in a fire
With no grown ups around, corruption ran free
The soul of the fed, seized by CCPE
But all was not hopeless and all was not lost
For there was a fire cutting into the frost
A rumble was coming with temps below zero
And the wrestling world was in need of a hero
One who was true and one who was right
The one who was here to end the long night
He came into town and made a huge splash
And now he was here to take out the trash
He walked through the castle, his eyes on the throne
The new King had arrived, his name was
Max Stone
The rumble kicked off with the pop of a cork
First out was a hit man named Eoin O'Rourke
With a grudge against Max,
He felt that he'd been wronged,
He thought Max had taken what was his all along
They'd met twice before, both times for some gold
But Eoin as champion, a story untold
Eoin put up a fight, but Max was too quick
He dodged every move, and gave Eoin a kick
Then with one mighty throw, Max sent Eoin flying
Over the rope, down to the floor crying
Max turned and he spotted Eoin’s friend Trigger
He’s decent enough but his brother looms bigger
A proud Irish man, he clenched tight to his clover
But his luck had run out and his evening was over
As he lied on the floor, he wish he’d went far
Then he started his march, back to John at the bar
But this clique wasn’t done for, here was Eoin’s wife Lizzie
Unprepared for this match, she must have been busy
But she wasn’t no slouch, a true vet of the game
Until she went out as fast as she came
There stood the last of the Club, the errand boy Andy
The last hope of the group but he wasn't too handy
He'd have to wait longer to make his real mark
For this wasn't the night for the thuggish loan shark
Numero Dos was Ryan McCann
But nobody cared, not one single fan
A scholarly kid, he hit the books hard
Only to get beaten, battered, and scarred
His business knowledge never pleased any bosses
Never a profit, just a record of losses
Terry Marshall was fourth, he was finally here
He’s here once a year to steal Christmas cheer
He was no longer spry, he had gotten much older
So slow in the ring and moved like a boulder
Stone was more agile, real quick on his feet
He sent Terry packing and it was too sweet
And poor old Terry, repeating his pattern
Is back in his spaceship, orbiting Saturn
Out from the darkness appeared Caleb Scott
He may have had gold but a king he was not
A scared little child, a dark twisted soul
All of the pressure had taken its toll
He thought long and hard but he’d made a bad choice
The Purge took his soul to feast and rejoice
But he’d gone way too far, he could never come back
And then Max Stone sent him back to the black
But Caleb feared not, here came Ryan Hawkins
The one in the Purge who does all the talkin’
He had kidnapped a lady to try to strike fear
But that was the past and it wouldn’t work here
Despite all of his tricks and all of his schemes
The top rope, he went over, still hungry for dreams
We hit number 8 and here’s Andre Cash
He could have been special, but he talked too much trash
A force to be reckoned with, a beast in the trenches
But spent most of his time sitting on benches
He should have wreaked havoc, he was supposed to force fumbles
But now he’s on Netflix losing in rumbles
Eddie Charisma is here…
At spot number nin….
First out was a hit man named Eoin O'Rourke
With a grudge against Max,
He felt that he'd been wronged,
He thought Max had taken what was his all along
They'd met twice before, both times for some gold
But Eoin as champion, a story untold
Eoin put up a fight, but Max was too quick
He dodged every move, and gave Eoin a kick
Then with one mighty throw, Max sent Eoin flying
Over the rope, down to the floor crying
Max turned and he spotted Eoin’s friend Trigger
He’s decent enough but his brother looms bigger
A proud Irish man, he clenched tight to his clover
But his luck had run out and his evening was over
As he lied on the floor, he wish he’d went far
Then he started his march, back to John at the bar
But this clique wasn’t done for, here was Eoin’s wife Lizzie
Unprepared for this match, she must have been busy
But she wasn’t no slouch, a true vet of the game
Until she went out as fast as she came
There stood the last of the Club, the errand boy Andy
The last hope of the group but he wasn't too handy
He'd have to wait longer to make his real mark
For this wasn't the night for the thuggish loan shark
Numero Dos was Ryan McCann
But nobody cared, not one single fan
A scholarly kid, he hit the books hard
Only to get beaten, battered, and scarred
His business knowledge never pleased any bosses
Never a profit, just a record of losses
Terry Marshall was fourth, he was finally here
He’s here once a year to steal Christmas cheer
He was no longer spry, he had gotten much older
So slow in the ring and moved like a boulder
Stone was more agile, real quick on his feet
He sent Terry packing and it was too sweet
And poor old Terry, repeating his pattern
Is back in his spaceship, orbiting Saturn
Out from the darkness appeared Caleb Scott
He may have had gold but a king he was not
A scared little child, a dark twisted soul
All of the pressure had taken its toll
He thought long and hard but he’d made a bad choice
The Purge took his soul to feast and rejoice
But he’d gone way too far, he could never come back
And then Max Stone sent him back to the black
But Caleb feared not, here came Ryan Hawkins
The one in the Purge who does all the talkin’
He had kidnapped a lady to try to strike fear
But that was the past and it wouldn’t work here
Despite all of his tricks and all of his schemes
The top rope, he went over, still hungry for dreams
We hit number 8 and here’s Andre Cash
He could have been special, but he talked too much trash
A force to be reckoned with, a beast in the trenches
But spent most of his time sitting on benches
He should have wreaked havoc, he was supposed to force fumbles
But now he’s on Netflix losing in rumbles
Eddie Charisma is here…
At spot number nin….
Grandson: Papa, you’re falling asleep!
Papa: Sorry, where was I?
Alliyah Land…
Granddaughter: PAPA! Come on, you have to finish the story!
Papa: OK, OK…
He marched to the ring with his famous last name
Jay Vaughn had no problem cashing in on the fame
He had a pep to his step, he felt really cocky
But his performance that night was really quite rocky
He thought he could win one for dear Uncle Osh
But thanks to Max Stone he lost in a squash
At sweet sixteen entered Latoya Hixx
Another one of the brave fighting chicks
She thought she was tough, she thought she'd be queen
Until she went flying off of the screen
Curtis came out, what a fun little guy
He fought and he clawed for his piece of the pie
He was determined to win, overflowing with glee
To make daddy proud, his dad, Jonny C
Max threw him high in the sky then his feet hit the ground
And sweet little Curtis, no longer around
In at nineteen was a lizard so tiny
With his eyes on a crown that was ever so shiny
The dinosaur roared and brought out his claws
Hoping to cover all of his flaws
But cover he didn't and soon lost his way
He looked up from below, asking "por qué?!"
We should have been rocked when Amadeus appeared
Another hit-man that nobody feared
He went off on his own in spite of his dad
And right to Max Stone to get beaten quite bad
The thud was so hard it was heard in three counties
He gave up his dream and went back to take bounties
Thadwick Chaddeus Jackson the third
Impressively strong if you hadn't heard
He entered the rumble at spot twenty-one
But Max wouldn't let him have any fun
The brute was so strong he can beat up a horse
But that wasn't of any help here, of course
Thadwick Chaddeus Jackson part three
Papa: Sorry, where was I?
Alliyah Land…
Granddaughter: PAPA! Come on, you have to finish the story!
Papa: OK, OK…
He marched to the ring with his famous last name
Jay Vaughn had no problem cashing in on the fame
He had a pep to his step, he felt really cocky
But his performance that night was really quite rocky
He thought he could win one for dear Uncle Osh
But thanks to Max Stone he lost in a squash
At sweet sixteen entered Latoya Hixx
Another one of the brave fighting chicks
She thought she was tough, she thought she'd be queen
Until she went flying off of the screen
Curtis came out, what a fun little guy
He fought and he clawed for his piece of the pie
He was determined to win, overflowing with glee
To make daddy proud, his dad, Jonny C
Max threw him high in the sky then his feet hit the ground
And sweet little Curtis, no longer around
In at nineteen was a lizard so tiny
With his eyes on a crown that was ever so shiny
The dinosaur roared and brought out his claws
Hoping to cover all of his flaws
But cover he didn't and soon lost his way
He looked up from below, asking "por qué?!"
We should have been rocked when Amadeus appeared
Another hit-man that nobody feared
He went off on his own in spite of his dad
And right to Max Stone to get beaten quite bad
The thud was so hard it was heard in three counties
He gave up his dream and went back to take bounties
Thadwick Chaddeus Jackson the third
Impressively strong if you hadn't heard
He entered the rumble at spot twenty-one
But Max wouldn't let him have any fun
The brute was so strong he can beat up a horse
But that wasn't of any help here, of course
Thadwick Chaddeus Jackson part three
Realized this was hopeless and started to flee
Stone attacked the strong man then he started to cower
And Max threw him out, with ultra raw power
Sebastian Hamilton entered at spot twenty-two
But without his brothers, what could he do?
He had been gone for so long, not a single sighting
And now he was back, returned from his hiding
He couldn’t fight fair, he couldn’t do it alone
And then once again, he fell to Max Stone
Kirbiquitous Kirby popped in towards the end
If you've been paying attention, you're spotting a trend
So young and so new with so much to see
K-Jax with the crown, was not meant to be
He entered the rumble with something to prove
But Mr. Charisma could not find his groove
Like all those before and all those to come
Kirbiquitous Kirby was beat like a drum
Sabrina Knight came along from the sunny south west
Intending to show that she's one of the best
Royal already, in her own mind
She found herself in a heck of a bind
Always got what she wanted, but not what she needed
And now she was left ice cold and defeated
As we began to approach the end of this train
We were graced by the presence of one, Liam Cain
He's a good old boy and he loves to drink beer
But it takes more than that to make this crowd cheer
He shows up when he wants, he's the freest free bird
Loaded with booze, his words were all slurred
This Hickory boy sure loved some good fights
Until Max Stone knocked out his lights
Bobby Mack hit the ring, a big Hollywood actor
His theatrical skills were never a factor
He liked to play cards while having a smoke
And his stint in the rumble was quite a big joke
He couldn't get the job done, despite all his rambling
Max tossed his ass out and he went back to gambling
Stone attacked the strong man then he started to cower
And Max threw him out, with ultra raw power
Sebastian Hamilton entered at spot twenty-two
But without his brothers, what could he do?
He had been gone for so long, not a single sighting
And now he was back, returned from his hiding
He couldn’t fight fair, he couldn’t do it alone
And then once again, he fell to Max Stone
Kirbiquitous Kirby popped in towards the end
If you've been paying attention, you're spotting a trend
So young and so new with so much to see
K-Jax with the crown, was not meant to be
He entered the rumble with something to prove
But Mr. Charisma could not find his groove
Like all those before and all those to come
Kirbiquitous Kirby was beat like a drum
Sabrina Knight came along from the sunny south west
Intending to show that she's one of the best
Royal already, in her own mind
She found herself in a heck of a bind
Always got what she wanted, but not what she needed
And now she was left ice cold and defeated
As we began to approach the end of this train
We were graced by the presence of one, Liam Cain
He's a good old boy and he loves to drink beer
But it takes more than that to make this crowd cheer
He shows up when he wants, he's the freest free bird
Loaded with booze, his words were all slurred
This Hickory boy sure loved some good fights
Until Max Stone knocked out his lights
Bobby Mack hit the ring, a big Hollywood actor
His theatrical skills were never a factor
He liked to play cards while having a smoke
And his stint in the rumble was quite a big joke
He couldn't get the job done, despite all his rambling
Max tossed his ass out and he went back to gambling
Granddaughter: PAPA! There are children here!
Grandfather: I'm just reading what's on the page!
Grandson: I feel like we missed some people here.
Grandfather: We're not finished yet!
What ever became of the ones we skipped past?
It turns out we saved the most wicked for last
The ones who were classless, rotten, and low
The ones who all needed to pack up and go
The Second Coming was left, a slick group of four
Their bellies all full but they still wanted more
In came Rhett, at last number thirty,
Increasing his chance to do something dirty
But Max Stone was ready, for soon he would revel
He'd fight fair and square, not sinking down to their level
He threw Rhett over the ropes, and Sawyer right after
Maverick tried a low blow, but Max was much faster
He tossed Beckett out too, and the crowd went wild
The Second Coming was gone, they had all been exiled
All that remained were the villainous three
The three that stood for the CCPE
They looked really cocky and ever so smug
Max stuck to his plan of removing each thug
Xavier Lux, the first one to fall
He gave it a go, he gave it his all
They summoned him in to even their chances
It usually works, in these circumstances
But the going got hard, the going got tough
And Xavier proved to not be enough
Over the ropes, he was launched through the air
Then Max put his crosshairs on Fred Debonair
Fred Debonair, the champ of UK
With Lux out of the match, he started to fray
How could this happen? How could this be?
But then Debonair attacked with his knee
Always resourceful, and always quite clever
Fred foolishly thought he'd had Max forever
Our hero stayed focused and tried to stay calm
BUT THEN MAX STONE WENT OFF LIKE A BOMB
What once was a battle had turned into a war
And Fred found himself in the rumble no more
Only one remains and now they've locked eyes
Both ready to give all it takes for the prize
Both want it more than each other could know
But only one will win and the other will go
The time is now for this rumble to end
And Joe's all alone, gone away are his friends
Max had been training for weeks, with all of his might,
To take down the guy with all bark and no bite.
But Max Stone was different, he trained hard and true
Laser focused on J Mont, his time to shine through
Joe strutted and yapped, a know-it-all clown
Imparting his knowledge to all those around
But nobody cared, all had started to hope
That Max would send J Mont over the rope
It was just that he did, with skill and with grace
J Mont was no match, he couldn't keep pace
Max Stone was the best, the new king with his crown
He sent J Mont packing away from this town
Back home to his daughter, J Mont had to go
He learned a new lesson, and now he must know:
Max Stone is the best, the head of the class
J Mont was just fools gold, a pain in the ass
Max was the victor and now he stood tall
He lived up to his word, he'd conquered them all
The people went crazy and started to cheer
Can you believe it? IT'S FINALLY HERE!
ALL OF THE HYPE AND ALL OF THE TALK
AND NOW WE'RE ALL HERE AT 12 O'CLOCK
DOES IT MAKE SENSE?
ARE YOU ABLE TO SEE?
THAT MY TIME IS HERE AND I'M FINALLY FREE?
NOW YOU CAN BE PROUD WHEN YOU LOOK IN THE RING
FOR I AM MAX STONE
AND I AM THE KING