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Post by Osh Vaughan on Mar 7, 2021 16:47:08 GMT
 World Title Jake vs Jonny Special Guest Referee – Shawn Taylor  vs  Special Guest Ref  |
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Post by Jake E Dangerously on Mar 8, 2021 0:40:52 GMT
The illustrious IIW hallways. Long are their many and hallowed tales of grappling legend. The main events that have taken place, the ring generals who have graced it's presence, and that one broom closet that has had a banging on it since IIW reopened it's doors. Closet - muffled noises
In the hallway in front of the door that people will sometimes go the long way around just to avoid Jake E Dangerously stops to look at the door. Jake – Did you say something?
He scratches his head and shrugs.
Just when he is turns to start walking away the closet makes a more frantic banging and more muffled cries. Jake – Why does this door have a lock on the outside, that's weird...
He unlocks the door, and being the stalwart of bravery that he is, slowly opens the door. The first rays of light from the dull neon glow of the hallway lights hit a dishevelled man. His hair has grown tangled and he has a thick, twisted beard. Jake – Fishburger?
Once again hearing the sound of a clear human voice the man snaps his head towards the speaker, his eyes wide and crazed. Man – It's Fishburg actually.
He's pretty well spoken for a feral human. Jake – Larry? Is that you? No one's been looking for you, Osh said you were in a looney bin. What are you doing in the broom closet?
Larry – That uncouth janitor locked me in there. How long have I been in there?
Jake – Larry, no one's seen or heard from you since 2012.
Larry – Well how long ago was that? What's going on now?
Jake – I'm about to face Jonny C at the upcoming pay per view for the World Championship.
Larry – Delightful, then it hasn't been too long, I haven't missed it.
Jake – Missed it? Larry you've been locked in a broom closet for nearly nine years!
Larry – Surely you jest. It can't have been that long, you're facing Jonny for the World's Championship.
Jake – Larry, no one has seen of heard from you in nine years. IIW closed down, a few times. It's just started up again and we're headed into our first pay per view back where Jonny and I will compete in the finals to the Lockdown Invitational which has been made into a World Championship match.
Larry – Splendid, then I'm just in time.
He pulls out a microphone from who knows where. Larry – Now I just have a few questions about your upcoming match-up for the World title...
Jake cuts him off, he was going to push away the microphone but thinks better of it before he touches it. Jake – No, no... First Larry I think you need to answer a few questions for us. Firstly, how did you get in that closet.
Larry – Well it was the janitor, he said for safety that Osh had started paying our checks out of the closet here...
Jake – Larry, Charlie's never actually been paid in money. He gets paid in bleach and lemon Pledge, why would you believe him?
Larry – Who am I to besmirch the good name of Schmidt? He's never steered me wrong in the past.
Jake – That's the third closet he's locked you in since I started in IIW. How did you survive in there?
Larry – Fortunately the IIW Arena has never had the best luck with plumbing, there was a leaky pipe and I survived on the dripping water. For sustenance I sustained myself on the mold that grows in many of our finer closets and dressing rooms. No one has ever come in to clean it, so it was a daily buffet. Since I could never find the light switch I was left in the dark, which proved complicated when designating one corner as a bathroom.
Jake E looks down at Larry's pants. Jake – You could have at least undone your pants when you had to go.
Larry – Please do not look at the back... But enough of my trivial trials and tribulations! About you match-up with Jonny C! How fares you? How fares he? How have you come to this place once again?
Jake E lets out a long sigh. Jake – It's been a long time Larry, but some things refuse to change. Osh is one of them. Once again he's saved up enough money to reopen IIW, and the first thing he does is call all the old names, including Jonny C...
Larry – Ah yes, that lifetime contract.
Jake – Yeah that lifetime contract. Osh called the old names starting with Jonny C and myself to come help get this thing off the ground again, this time with a deal to run shows on Netflix and promote the Lockdown Invitational Cup, which has now turned into a World Heavyweight Championship match. Thing is, from the time it was announced we all knew this is how it would end. Jonny on one side, me on the other, but for the first time in a LONG time, the World Title is on the line. It's been nearly fourteen years since Jonny C and I looked across the ring from each other in a World Title match. The last one didn't exactly go my way. The last World Championship match Jonny C and I were in ended up with him ending the longest title reign in IIW history. It's funny though that even he sometimes glosses over that match and mainly remembers the many defeats.
Larry – Well there have been many, many defeats he's faced at your hands.
Jake – Maybe so, but it's the one he won that made all the difference. When I reigned IIW was at it's height. It's most popular, it's most profitable, and I told Jonny one thing, I said if he won it would make his entire career, and it did. The biggest problem wasn't making his career though, it's what he did with it. In less time than my entire title reign Jonny C managed to tank IIW. Business dropped off in every possible way, and with Jonny C as the “face” of IIW, we went out of business.
But by that time he had enough name recognition to get himself a job anywhere. People thought they'd get a big name in wrestling, someone worth paying for. Every company since has found out the same thing IIW found out in 2007, Jonny C has never drawn a dime, not at least nearly as much as he cost. He has a big name, but nothing behind it. It's why he led the charge again a few years later with his stupid lifetime contract, and it put IIW out of business again. I did what I could, I was an undefeated International Champion.
Larry – I was going to ask if you gave it up or if it was vacated.
Jake – It was Osh's favourite way of getting a title off a strong champion Larry, stripped due to IIW closure. They tried this again in 2017, but I saw it was the same old thing again and didn't stick around, and again Jonny C's stupid contract drove IIW out of business.
Larry – So why come back now? Why have another go if it will end the same?
Jake – It dawned on me Larry that this nonsense is damaging my legacy. All the years I put into this business, all my hard work and blood and sweat I've put in all over the world are being hurt by these idiots constantly killing things off. If the best IIW can boast is Jonny C then my reign as champion becomes meaningless. If my legacy, all the title defences, carrying and defending two World Titles at the same time all over the globe, the money that we made and the men who gave their all to try to take those titles from me only add up to the pubescent antics of Jonny C than my legacy means nothing.
I didn't just bust my ass for this company. I didn't just bust my ass for that title. I busted my ass night in and night out, day after day to build up IIW to the unmatched pinnacle of professional wrestling, only for it to be torn down time and time again in minutes by a professional buffoon. I'm not going to let that happen again. I don't care if I have to hold that title for the rest of time, until someone else comes along and proves that they can carry the weight of being the World Champion, I'm never letting go of it again.
Jonny C talks about thing being the same old, but the same old has only killed us over and over again. The same old leaves IIW to rot in history, forgotten, when it should be talked about in the highest regards. The same old leaves IIW as “that Jonny C company” a place where someone like you somehow becomes the standard of excellence instead of the mediocrity in it's purest state that you are.
I know it'll shock you to find this out Jonny, but I've never tried to end you. You think you're some eternal thorn in my side and that we're going to be forever locked in mortal combat until the end of time because neither one of us will give up. You're right about the last part, but you're wrong about our roles. No one cares if you ever get back up or not. You're not here because you're some great public nuisance that people love to hate. You're here because Osh Vaughn loves to make as many bad business decisions as he does good ones. You're here because Osh signed you to a life time contract and somewhere along the line his ex wife mistook you for someone else and you got her knocked up. End of story. You're here because Osh is legally obliged to include you even though all the evidence shows that you are DIRECTLY to blame for IIW closing its doors EVERY FUCKING TIME.
I'm sick of it. I'm sick of going almost fourteen years to get another shot at the IIW World Championship. I'm sick of having to see Jonny C pull whatever moron bullshit out of his ass again to see everyone turn off Mayhem, to stop buying tickets, to stop buying merch. I'm sick of watching Jonny C lower the bar of excellence and kill this company time and time again.
Fourteen years ago Jonny I made a mistake. I was defending my title and for three seconds I let you be better than me. I made your entire career that night Jonny, and I'm sorry. Not to you, but to everyone else who would ever work for IIW. To Osh Vaughn who had to keep sinking money into the Jonny C money-pit, to everyone who lost their jobs because of you. Everyone who's had to sleep on the street because they tried to make it in this company, everyone who lost their family because of your callous narcissism, everyone who went hungry to feed your ego. I'm sorry to every fan who tuned into IIW thinking they would see the best of the best and to everyone who tuned out because they were sold a raw deal when they had the idea of you being the best pressed upon them.
And Jonny C, I am sorry to you, I'm sorry I gave you a chance fourteen years ago to show exactly what you were made of. I'm sorry I made one small mistake and let you think there was any way you could ever be best in the world, but most of all I'm sorry to myself for every time I've beaten Jonny C and it never again being for the World Championship, but at KKND I finally get the chance to right years of wrongs, I get the chance to take the one thing from Jonny C that's ever mattered to him, the only thing he's ever managed to take from me. I finally get to end fourteen years of wrongs and once again regain MY IIW World Championship.
Fade. |
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Post by JonnyFNC on Mar 8, 2021 18:16:40 GMT
A tank comes rolling into the IIW arena parking lot. It comes to a stop right before the entrance to the locker room area. The hatch on top is pushed open as Jonny C pops halfway out. Jonny is wearing a ww2 army helmet with camo and netting on it. He has his face painted in full camo and is wearing a camo jacket.
Jonny C - The war wages on ladies and gentlemen. The great War between Jake E Dangerously and Infamous Jonny C. The contract was signed last night and the match was made official. Both of us have signed on the dotted line and made this epic clash a reality. The kicker was pre subway Jared, Bob Mitchel flexed what little power he had and made the match a world title match. The stakes get higher I love it. What better 2 men to headline the first PPV for IIW in over 4 years and it's for the title? The time for talking is over its time for action. Wait no, the time for talk is not over we have a lot of that left to do. It's what I do best outside of wrestling. I even had this tank flown in from Canada to really hammer home how much a war this is. I would have driven it but there is a large body of water in the way and belive it or not tanks are pretty freaking slow. Got lots of fire power though so it's well worth the trade off.
Jonny pulls himself up a bit and sits on the open hatch.
Jonny - 13 years we have been doing this same song and dance. Jake we fought so many times I can't even remember them all. You would think people would be tired of seeing us main event shows. As I have seen they still love it. On another hand one would assume other talent would step up and try to make a name for themselves. You know what they say about assuming things though. We have the deepest most storied feud in IIW history. We have single handedly kept the doors open and the lights on in this place outside of the times we didn't and IIW closed. With out us Jake there would be no IIW. Obviously when I got the call that IIW was going to re open I immediately said yes. I had to say yes because of my insanely lucrative contract but I would have jumped at the chance either way. My first question to Osh was is Jake back. I knew in order for us to make this thing work and show the world we where really back for good we needed you. I knew that eventually you and I would be standing toe to toe once again for the world title. Yes I have been very complementary of you these last few weeks but don't get the wrong idea. I don't like you one bit Jake. I never have and everyone knows that. I also know that you don't care if I like you or not. I also don't care if you like me at all. In fact I know that you don't like me very much. That's the good thing about our feud is we know just about everything about each other. You're everything I hate in a person. The complete polar opposite of who I am as a person. I think that's most likely why we have kept this feud up for 13+ years. Even though I don't like you I do respect you. I know exactly how good you are in that ring. You have taken me to the absolute limit in the ring many many times. As I have done to you many times as well. We have left it all in the ring every single time we have met. Yes I am fully aware the win loss records favor you heavily. You have beaten me far more than I have beaten you.
Jonny spins his legs out of the hatch way. He steps down onto the tank treads.
Jonny - Trust me I know it better than anyone here. It haunts me to my core. I come out here every single God damn week and go on and on about how I'm the best wrestler to ever step in a ring. I tell everyone how I'm the greatest but deep down I know that's not entirely true. Yes I have beaten you, and for a title a time or two but you have won more. No matter what I say I can't change the record books. I'm at the top of my game as I always have been. I am ready to step into that ring with you one more time. You know why Jake? It's because I'm not scared of you. Not at all. You have given me everything you have and I always get to my feet. You have hit me with your finish more times than anyone else I'm positive of that but it's never killed me. You can't kill me Jake. You could beat me 100 times in a row and I will walk to the ring for match 101. I started wrestling because it what I love to do. Its all I have ever wanted to be. I'm damn good at it as well. I have reached heights in this business people can only dream of. I have traveled the world thousands of times over. I have won every single title in every fed I have ever worked for. This is my life and I wouldn't change it for the world. You can never take that away from me Jake. This match is for the world title but to me is bigger than that. It's about legacy. It's about being the best in the world. Whatever you have to say about me will never change anything Jake.
Jonny removes his helmet and places it on the top of the tank. He hops down to the ground and walks to the front of the tank. He reaches up and rubs the cannon barrel.
Jonny - I saw your little promo Jake. It was cute for sure. A nice little stroll down memory lane that's for sure. There where a number of inaccuracies in it though. The biggest and most blatant is that I'm not a thorn in your side. You say that we aren't locked in a mortal combat for life like I seem to think we are. I'm here to call bullshit on that immediately. You just know that's not true Jake. I'm going to break the forth wall for a few minutes so strap yourselves in. I know that's your guys thing Jake but allow me to infringe on the gimmick for a bit. Now we have a fed wide group chat. It started before we re opened the IIW. An easy way for Osh to reach everyone at once with any kind of news. Now at least once a day in said chat Jake you take a shot at me. Sometimes 2 or 3 shots a day. Have you noticed that I never usually respond to you. I find it insanely interesting that you claim I'm not an eternal thorn in your side but you can't keep my name out of your mouth. I guess this is what it's like to live in someone's head rent free. That's exactly what I'm doing Jake. I live in your head rent free. Every chance you get you use it to take a pot shot at me. If you're so over all of this shit with me why do you do that. Why can't you keep my name out of your mouth. I know it's cheap heat and all that crap but it's also kind of sad man. Sounds to me like you miss your glory days. It almost feels like you need to live in the past to feel good about yourself. Sounds to me like you care about me way more than I care about you. It's brings me great joy to know you're always thinking about me Jake. Say what you will but I know for a fact I'm always on your mind. That tickles me Jake. You like me you really like me. It's kind of nice, to know that after all of our battles I mean so much to you. You keep putting on that tough guy act but we all know the truth Jake. That I Infamous Jonny C the Harbinger of Chaos will always have a soft spot in your heart. For that I thank you. I often lay in bed and think of our greatest matches as well Jake so I know the feeling. Except I don't feel the need to take shots at you every chance I get. Another reason why I'm just a better person than you.
Jonny walks to the back of the tank and opens a storage compartment. He grabs his bag out and closes the compartment.
Jonny - Next big inaccurate falsehood you're peddling is that I am the sole reason the IIW closed up every single time. Come on man that was a collective effort by all parties involved not just me. You act like you weren't on the roster as well when we closed up. At least one of your little stable of assholes was employed here and did nothing to help the cause. I bleed IIW and my name is etched in the very foundation of it. It pained me to see the IIW shutter it's gates, a peice of me died that day. The root of all that crap was bad business deals and a maniac owner. It had nothing to do with in ring talent. That's something we have always had in droves. There was nothing I could have done to single handedly save the IIW. Just like there was nothing you could have done. I came out week and week and wrestled my ass off to put on the best show I could for the people that paid good hard earned money to see me. I'll let you spin your narrative, spin your little web of lies Jake that's fine but we all know the truth. Closing the doors had nothing to do with me but if thinking that helps you sleep better at night that's fine. I should be happy you put my name so highly up on the list of legends that you think it was solely my fault. Thank you for thinking so highly of me it's means alot Jake. I was and still am the face of this company. Yeah we closed more than once but that's fine. Let's west wing this.
Jonny grabs his bag and starts to walk into the arena. He pulls a set of keys out of his pocket and clicks the lock button on the tank. The hatch slams closed and a little horn beeps.
Jonny - This time around Netflix offered a monster deal for us. If closeing had anything to do with the talent not being able to deliver that deal never would have been signed. Say what you will Jake but I am proud to be the face of this company. I'm proud to be the name synonymous with IIW. Many legends have walked through this curtain. Heat, Ice, Jason Fenix, Donny Allen, Chino, hell even my old frenemy and ref of our match Shawn Taylor. Then there is you and I Jake the 2 legends that refuse to walk away. The 2 of us refuse to ride off into the sunset and call it a day. Maybe it's pride maybe its talent maybe it's stupidity but for some reason we just can't give it up. Regardless the amount of talent that has come through this federation has been 2nd to none and that in no way is why we closed our doors years ago. So as much as you can't keep me out of your mind you also can't keep blaming me for this place closing because it had nothing to do with me. Either way my lifetime contract paid out every single payment I was owed. Osh made sure of that and I appreciate that. You go on and on about how I am a professional clown essentially yet I am the one who was signed to a lifetime contract not you that should say something about how different our stock here is. That should show you who they want here more and for a longer time. When we closed I found other places to work all over the world in fact. I didn't need the money but Im never gonna say no to a free payday that's for sure. Say what you will but Osh signing a mega deal on Netflix and announcing Infamous Jonny C as the first signing was a huge moment met with huge fan fare.
Jonny kicks the door to the arena open. He makes his way down the hallway towards his locker room. He looks down and sees a disaster left behind by multiple men fighting for the hardcore title.
Jonny - 13 years ago I did beat you for a title. I did end your historically long title run. It was a 3 way dance but I pinned you to win the title. I said I was going to beat you and I did, nothing else matters. That was a huge moment for me and for this federation. I've done it once and I know I can and will do it again. You say I gloss over that fact I gloss over the title match where I beat you. You say I focus more on the times that you beat me. That's definitely true that's a very astute observation Jake. I beat you for the title that's old really old news. All that shows is that I can beat you and beat you for a title. I choose to focus more than times you beat me because it ignites that fire of competition. I know I can beat you I've done it more than once but your wins outweigh mine. That will always drive me to be better than you. It will always drive me to train harder than you do. I could rest on my laurels and just come out here and say how I beat you for a title and you've never beaten me for a world title. But what would that prove that wouldn't prove anything you would simply say that was 13 years ago it was a different time. I am more concerned with the losses to you Jake way more concerned. No matter how great I say I am you are always there to take the wind out from underneath me. That's why focus more on the losses. It drives me to be a better wrestler. I know I can beat you as you pointed out I have but I need to work hard to get to that point. I need to remember the losses to remember how good I need to be. I need to step into that ring and I need to be absolutely flawless from start to finish to beat you.
Jonny gets to his locker room and opens the door. He walks in and puts his bag into the locker. He grabs a bottle of water out of the cooler and takes a sip.
Jonny - I don't need to come out here and be Mr. Cool guy like you Jake. I don't care what my image is that's why I tagged myself as infamous. To you reputation is everything, it means the world to you. This is my Passion my life's work yes but I still enjoy and have a lot of fun doing it. It doesn't seem like it's fun for you anymore Jake. Mr. No nonsense tough guy that's who you've become. Actually it feels like that to you always been. It always seems to bother you that I would have fun that I really enjoyed doing this. It's not about the money it's about being the best and proving to myself that I am. 13 years ago I did that and I plan to do it again in 2 weeks. I find it funny that you came out and you said this wasn't personal and that you never tried to end me. For 13 years all you've been trying to do is end me and all you've been telling people you were going to do is end me. Again a giant contradiction Jake and I am king of contradicting myself so for me to call you on it that it's just embarrassing. You've thrown every single thing you have at me it's never been enough to keep me down longer than a 3 count. Admittedly that 3 count is very important and I get that. But I keep coming nothing will stop me from getting what I want. Not even you could stop me Jake. I know you better than any wrestler I have ever set foot in that ring with. We have done it many times in the past. Win or lose none of that matters anymore.
Jonny takes a seat and throws his feet up on the table infront of him
Jonny - We're here today for the next pay per view the relaunch pay per view. Dawn of a new era if you will. I knew the second I agreed to come back here it would be me and you again. There was only one main event I wanted because like it or not we have unfinished business. Our business has changed a lot over the past year. We have been effected by what's going on with the pandemic. We've all lost people we've all lost money we all lost wrestling in front of fans. The entire world changed in the matter of weeks. There is a chance it will never go back to the way it was. My job is to make people happy. My job is to put on a match so spectacular people forget for just a little while how crazy this world is. My goal is to send everyone home happy. Far different than my attitude was 2 years ago but things have changed. This sport that I love was almost completely taken away from all of us. Fans are now back and I can't wait to wrestle in front of all of them. I can't wait to steal the show to prove that I am here because I deserve it. I can't wait to stand toe to toe with you Jake and tske that title away from you. As you so clearly pointed out I've done in the past when you were the champion. There is only one man that deserves to be the new 1st ever champion here and that's me.
Jonny takes another sip of water and runs his hand through his hair.
Jonny - You never gave me a false sense of success Jake. You didn't make a mistake 13 years ago. I outwrestled you 13 years ago plain and simple. Don't you dare try to diminish what I did that day. What does that say about you Jake if I am such a terrible talent. If I suck so bad and somehow lucked my way into the the title match what does that say about your title run. If some chump can waltz out and end your run. I beat 2 of the top talents to ever set foot in this company. I ended your historically long title reign and I know that bothers you. I told the world I was taking the world title from you and it's exactly what I did. I am here to tell the world the same thing one more time. History doesn't always repeat itself but sometimes it does. Once again we find ourselves in a world title match and once again your going to fall victim to me. You can dust off all the old insane relics from our past. Sure nostalgia's great I guess but times have changed. Larry was a jabroni then and he still is today. Change is coming Jake you can hold on to the past all you want but it's My future you should be concerned with. Our war has been lengthy there have been many battles fought but something tells me it's far from over. I don't care what you say I plan to be a perennial thorn in your side for the for the foreseeable future Jake.
Jonny stands up and unzips his cameo jacket to reveal his new shirt. It's a mugshot of Jonny C that's says Professional Buffoon.
Jonny - It's got a nice ring to it doesn't it thanks for the new nickname Jake I kinda like it. This is now available on the IIW shop, pro wrestling Tee's and coming to a hot topic hear you. You see Jake try as you will but you can't hurt my feelings. This professional buffoon has tussled with you many many times and even took the title from you. That says way more about you than it does me. It's evident that you don't like me very much Jake and that's fine because I've stated in the past many times I'm not really a big fan of yours. I do know how good you are and you can say, do and act however you want but you know just how good I am to. We wouldn't have been doing this for 13 straight years or more than that actually if we weren't both top level talents in the ring. This song-and-dance would have fizzled out a long time ago if one of us couldn't step up to the plate. I've beaten you for a title once before Jake and I will do it again.
Jonny takes his jacket off and fixes his shirt so every can see his new shirt.
Jonny- Oh and Shawn I didn't forget about you buddy. You better call this match right down the middle or I'm coming after you active wrestler or not. We go way back Shawn. We where enimes then somehow we became tag team champions then we where enimes again. I know how you operate Shawn, I will be on my toes and ready for any of your shenanigans come KKND. This is my time Shawn not yours just know that now. No one is paying to see you dancing around looking like a deranged zebra. The masses want want me see me claim the World title and I will give them what they want. Shawn I know you're semi retired but that means nothing to me. I will put you down if I need to and not think twice.
Jonny sits back down.
Jonny - Can we talk about the ending of mayhem for a second thought. The shock of Shawn being added as a ref and the shock of it being a title match now. Wow some great twists. Then at the end of the show in the last closing seconds Osh calls out for my boy. My BFFL Jay. I am pumped my boy is coming in. Oh we are going to have some fun for sure when he gets here. Osh seems to be putting some kind of crew together that's something I will need to keep my eye on. I didn't know Jay and Osh where even that close. It's going to be very interesting. Call me when you arrive Jay we got alot to catch up on
Jonny takes another sip of water then pours some on his head.
Jonny - Jake this is only the beginning. We will be locked in a near mortal combat for life. Wherever you go I will be there waiting. I'm very Thorny Jake. Get it because I'm a thorn in your side. Oh wait you claim I'm not yet constantly run your mouth about me outside of promos. Whatever helps you get through the day pal. We got 2 weeks left before our match. Alot can happen in that time many things can change for sure. Jake we got 2 more of these fun little promos so make them good won't you. I will be patiently waiting for your rebuttal bitch.
Jonny users the cameras out of his locker room as the scene fades to black. |
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Post by Jake E Dangerously on Mar 12, 2021 15:52:00 GMT
Jake: First of all, dumb ass, it's a SUPERSHOW. It's available on Netflix like all the rest, that's part of our deal. It's not a Pay Per View. I would have thought that someone so integral to the company like you think you are would know that. Then again, you're the guy who was telling everyone from the beginning that the Lockdown Tournament was for the World Title, which it wasn't until that one guy, I guess, got away with turning it into a World Title match and you were proved right just by the dumb luck that has ruled your career.
He's back in his favourite spot recently, the stands around the ring in the IIW arena. There have been very few fans sitting in them lately, but that's for reasons entirely out of everyone's control. Jake: I'm not going to try to diminish the past Jonny, until Osh unearthed the tapes recently no one even remembered that there WAS a third guy in our match all those years ago. You referred to him as one of the greatest of all time, so way to make him seem more important than he really was, but the only thing people still remembered to this day was the finish. That one time Jonny C beat Jake E Dangerously.
He's wearing Jonny C's new “Professional Buffoon” shirt. Jake: Oh this? Well you obviously need the money if it's been all this time and you're STILL using me to make money. The things I do, the things I say, they've made everything you ever got Jonny. I know you'll spin it some other way like it's been all your hard work, but come on, this is IIW, everyone here knows, you're just taking everything we ever give you. When you started in IIW you were nothing Jonny. You're whole legacy in this business that you love is all based right here. You became a household name here, you grew your own infamy here, and you turned this all into your legacy.
A legacy that includes, but is not limited to you thinking you're the “face” of IIW because you're the first name announced whenever IIW reopens it's doors. Only you can't see that for what it is, a bad news first kind of situation. People know you're coming Jonny, it's the contractual obligation to bring you back. People don't really care if you're here or not, you've never actually added anything to IIW. Osh has to bring you back or he knows you'll sue him for breach of contract. On the other hand same thing, you don't come back and he sues you. While Osh is crazy, he's true to his word, that's why you get paid every time even if it means IIW has to close it's doors again. You claim you have all this money and don't need the payday, but look at you Jonny, you drive around a tank and the amount of red tape you have to go through to get one of those much less the permission to drive it around and the high price of gas these days. It's OK Jonny, you've never been good with money and that's OK, that's why I threw you a few bucks for the shirt and let you have the IP that I created for you.
He sits back in the seat and spreads his arms across the empty ones on either side of him. Jake: Let's chat a little bit more about legacy shall we Jonny, that's what this match is really about after all. You say you don't care but you drove to the arena in a tank. You call yourself “Infamous”. You say you don't care but you go out of your way to do these over the top things to gain yourself attention. Like that time you scoured the globe for a genetics team that would find enough in common that you could claim Curtis as your son and steal him away from Osh. You've always been desperate for attention and you put on this fake little show of acting like you don't care just so people will pay even more attention on you.
You call this your passion, your life's work and I agree. You're very passionate about being a professional buffoon. Why else eavesdrop on every locker room conversation you're ever around to overhear or oversee? Because you're desperate for the attention. You always have been. You don't care about quality or legacy or being viewed as the best ever, oh I know you've SAID you care about all that stuff, but like you said you're the king of contradicting yourself.
But it's not exactly EVERYONE'S attention you crave now is it? It's just mine. It's always been mine. Since the first day we stepped in the ring with each other you've been desperate to have me acknowledge you. You listen to every word I say everywhere I say it, but if you listened to the full picture you would hear that everyone makes fun of you backstage Jonny. You're the butt of everyone's jokes in the locker room. Not just the locker room, board meetings, Netflix conference calls, training sessions with the new talent, radio interviews, podcasts, fan message boards, subreddits... It's a well known fact. Now I know you're gonna justify all that away because it's what you need to do to sleep at night and say you're living rent free in my head and if that's what you need then fine. I'm a part of all that Jonny but I'm not the start and I'm not the end. The fact is as long as IIW exists you are the albatross that drags it down and that's a fact that we all know and we're all just doing what we can to cope with it. We're taking the bad with the good.
He looks down at the shit eating grin on his shirt and shrugs. Jake: I can't say it's a huge surprise that you took something I said about you and put it on a shirt, you've spent more than a decade trying to be me. You've got this thing now where you keep telling everyone that you've won titles everywhere you've ever been and that you're in high demand, but you're loyal so you keep coming back. The wrestling world is small and it's hard to hide secrets Jonny, especially for you with a big mouth and the inability to keep secrets and a reputation for making stuff up. You claim you've won titles everywhere, but didn't you just lose a title match like last week? And just before that some other promotion drove you out because you're a drama queen. That's your reputation outside of IIW, you're a loud obnoxious braggart that never can quite back up your claims. You've got that one big win over me that turns promoters heads and get you in the door because everyone in this business has heard of me.
You roped Osh into signing you to a lifetime contract in IIW so you like to think it's all about you, but he can control everything you do Jonny, he's got you for life good or bad. Take a look at what's happened to Larry or Charlie or even Ste and that's your future. I know you were eager to sign on for life because this is the best you'll ever do Jonny, but on the other side Osh chases ME. While he TELLS you to pack your shit and get back here, he comes to me every single time because, as you said yourself, you need me. You need me for IIW to work. I proved that long before I ever made it to IIW. Unlike you Jonny who just says stuff and hope it's not followed up on, I can back up my claims. I build companies. People see the name Jake E Dangerously and they know there's the best. Just look around Jonny, look at how many people have been trying to join IIW this time around. Look at the influx of new talent chomping at the bit to get into that ring.
He indicates the IIW ring not far in the foreground. Jake: And you really think that's because of you. How many people tried to join IIW last time without me Jonny? I don't need to prove IIW's chances without me because I've got over a decade of history to prove it. Every time you're in the spotlight you get into some dumb ass melodrama with Osh and it kills off business. Time and time again, but you keep coming back because this is your passion, this is your life's work. You're life's work is killing this company. That's your legacy, Jonny.
You keep doing this because you love it, you're having fun, then you're a sick son-of-a-bitch who gets of on murder because we've all seen you kill this company time and again. But I'm the stick in the mud, I'm the sad sack and I'm not having any fun. Yeah OK, Jonny, you got me. It's not fun watching something you love die. It's not fun watching something you care deeply about get murdered time and time again, just because a Professional Buffoon needs to “have fun”. No one but you has fun with your antics Jonny, no one. That's why people keep tuning out. You think Netflix offered up a big money deal because your terminally unmarketable face is attached? It's in spite of that. Netflix put forward that much money on the condition that I get brought in, and you know why Jonny? It's about more than just having fun.
I know you've only ever thought about yourself, but let me indulge you for a minute because you said you know more about me than anyone you've ever stepped in the ring with, but after all this time you have shown that you still know fuck all about me. You think I don't care? Because I don't have fun watching you kill something other people work so hard for? Fuck you Jonny, it's called passion. I know you're AWARE of the concept because you used the word, but you clearly don't know what it means. You see unlike you Jonny, I don't see IIW as this vanity project I used to prop myself up and have people talk about me. I don't see IIW s my reputation in wrestling, I built that before I ever got here. IIW is my legacy. IIW is the thing I leave behind for others. IIW is the place I leave for everyone else who dreams big dreams in the business to come and establish themselves as the best.
You want to set yourself up as the face of this company and make you think that you're the best because that's what I've set up for you. You bested me ONCE years ago and you've been trying to live my life ever since, but you got one very important thing wrong Jonny, ever since that match you never got any better. You got worse. You used to drive yourself to excel and get better and outdo yourself, but once you beat me, that was it. You stopped striving to get better and you stagnated and everyone passed you by. In case you didn't catch on Jonny that meant the world passed IIW by. If you're the face of IIW but you're stuck in a moment from thirteen years ago the business is going to treat this company the way we all treat you, like an old joke.
But you never got that you're a punch line. You put on your “I don't care” armour and act like it's just our jealousy so you can keep living in your own little world. It's time to wake up from that world Jonny. It's time to face reality. The reality is that is you really care about anything other than yourself then you need to change. Jonny C isn't enough to carry forward the legacy of IIW. I gave you that opportunity once, but you've failed miserably.
You keep telling you yourself that I hate you, that I need you to end, and maybe that's your way of telling me something Jonny. Maybe that's your way of telling me this whole time that you need me to end you. Is that it Jonny? That one night over 13 years ago, that was the best you'll ever do, and if we want IIW to really exist and flourish again that I need to end you once and for all? Because this whole time I've been trying to push you to get better. Trying to get you to grow up. You say I didn't give you a false sense of success, then do you truly feel like the failure you've been for more than a decade? Is that's what's going on here Jonny?
You know I actually thought you wanted us to do this dance forever. This is when you're at your best, across the ring from me. How can you think I didn't make a mistake years ago? I pushed you to be the best you've ever been and do something truly historic and I thought that would inspire you to continue pushing yourself to get better, but you just froze. That's why you've lost to me every time since, you think you're special because you get back up every time I beat you Jonny, but you're just insane. You keep doing the same thing over and over and expect the same result.
I've grown up and changed, Jonny. You think I stopped caring because I don't have as much fun beating you as I did years ago. Back then I wanted to beat you because it was fun, and it is fun, but now I HAVE to beat you Jonny, because I actually care. Not just about myself, I care about this company too. And now you're play pal is going to come in so you can tear this place apart even quicker and then sit outside on the curb and wonder what went wrong. You went wrong Jonny, you're always the answer to that question. You like to think it's other factors, and some weird stuff does go on here, but it always has, but the one mortal wound IIW always suffers from is you.
So where do we go from here?
He stands up. Jake: First, Jonny, we're going to get in that ring again. You think this is some next chapter in our never ending war, but that's the way you've always looked at it. Me trying to end your career once and for all while you heroically stand back up again, but that's you Jonny, never wanting things to change. You always want to be locked in this struggle forever because it's when you're at your best, cast as David in your own mind against me as Goliath, but that's a future only you want Jonny. You're locked in the now because this is your best. You want to think of us as the top talents in the ring because that's what we were once, but look behind you Jonny, while you stopped to admire the view there are a LOT of hungry guys right behind you that want their chance to prove themselves as the best in this business. This isn't another in a long line of our struggles Jonny because it doesn't come with your inevitable come back story. At KKND all I'm going to prove is that I'm STILL better than you, the only difference is this time I'm going to prove it to you by winning back the title you've proved you were never worthy of holding.
I'm sorry your story doesn't end the way you want Jonny, we're not going down in some blaze of glory shoot out, the two best of a generation taking each other out. You lost that ending years ago. This time once you get knocked down it's all those other guys like Scotty Adams or Jesse James or Russell Wayne that take you out for good. The division between us has never been wider Jonny, and after this match it will be a good long time before we meet again, and if we do, it wont be the same us. I don't have anything to prove by beating this Jonny C. Once I've taken back what's mine it's going to take you an awful climb to get back here. This isn't your IIW anymore, the place you keep killing off has been left in the past. You say I need to be focused on your future and I am Jonny, because it's not looking good. Your future is leaving you in the dust, looking at the IIW that could have been for the last thirteen years where the best of the best come to prove themselves and you get better or you get left behind. You got left behind years ago Jonny, you just haven't realized it yet. In order for IIW to have a future it has to look to the past, to me, to fix all that you've undone over the last few years.
He starts to walk down the row of chairs to the aisle. Jake: You say the war rages on Jonny, but it's nearing it's end. If you can't feel that then you're even more hopelessly lost in the past than I thought. You're crying out in you own way for me to finally end you, but I can't just now Jonny, I have to think about the future, and that means I have bigger things on my plate than you. As much as you think we know each other, you know nothing at all. You are right about us being different though. You've spent your whole career trying to be me when you don't know the first thing about me. Let me introduce myself Jonny, I'm all the things you'll never be. Important. Remembered. IIW World Heavyweight Champion.
He stands in the main aisle looking back at the camera. Jake: Have fun having fun in that ring at KKND, Jonny. I'll be too busy actually caring. You have fun Jonny, I have passion. You think there's still enough time left between now and KKND for you to learn what that means? Probably not for you. You said you were at the top of your game and always have been. I guess that's it then, we've long since left your game in the past Jonny, you've just never noticed. I can't kill you Jon, but for the first time in a long time I'm going to get in that ring and show you that you can't kill IIW.
He walks off down towards the ring.
Fade. |
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Post by JonnyFNC on Mar 13, 2021 16:32:38 GMT
The Scene opens to Jonny C walking out to a podium. He is wearing a nice suit and his hair is tied back. He has some papers in his hand, a few note cards, some glasses, and a bottle of water. Jonny takes a sip of the water then clears his throat.
Jonny - Oh Jack your parade of spinning webs of lies continues. The amount of falsehood in that diatribe is absolutely astounding to me. It's like you feel if you just say things people will take them as gospel. I guess that's exactly what we do in a sense but not everything that's said should be believed. This time I took a good deal of notes. I am going to use this time to break down all the things you said in your promo that where not true at all or based on a truth you than manipulated. OK so let's start from the top shall well. So if I repeat anything that's on you Jake. I try to stay on track and space this out right so it doesn't appear longer than it really is. OK
Jonny puts on his reading glasses and picks up one sheet of paper on the side of the paper facing the camera it reads Jake Sucks.
Jonny - You said and I quote "First of all dumb ass it's a supershow." Well Jake thats where you are wrong. Do you not know how read man. The booking sheet we all received said PPV card. The contract we signed last week on mayhem read PPV Main event. So you can call it whatever you want but it's 100% listed as a PPV. Also I did tell everyone the lockdown tournament was for the title. Look Jake we are fighting for the title aren't we? We are the 2 finalists of the lock down tournament are we not and we are headlining the P......P.......V for the world title. So I wasn't wrong in anyway about it being for the title. It might pain you to learn that I know more than you do about what happens in the IIW. I am incredibly integral in the IIW and that's how I knew it would be a title match. It's not dumb luck as you pointed out Jake it's called insider knowledge. NEXT INACCURACY.
Jonny throws the paper he was holding and grabs the next one on the back of the paper it reads Jake Fears Adam
Jonny - I have never once claimed there wasn't a third man in the title match 13 years ago. I did exactly what I said I did. I beat you for the world title and ended your 90 day title reign. Explain to me where I lie about that or try to hide truths. Watch the match as you pointed out Osh posted it for everyone to see. I beat YOU Jake no one else. It was your shoulders pinned to the mat by me to win the the title. Say what you will but the end of that story stays the same 3rd man or not. MOVING ON
Jonny rips that sheet up and throws it over his shoulder. He picks up a new sheet. On the side facing the camera it says Jake is a fragile little girl.
Jonny - My new t-shirt, thanks for buying one. The people suffering from Covid will really appreciate your contribution. Oh yeah thats right you don't like to read. Again you just assumed I was in it for the money like you are. I beat your boy for 50k so I'm good. It you had taken any time to read the website you bought the shirt from you would have seen that 100% of proceeds go to helping with covid relief. People that are sick, or families who have lost someone and even people who are out of work or lost jobs entirely. So no Jake again the web of lies you spin about me needing money is false. I don't need or want the money from the shirts. Yes I turned something you said about me into a shirt. What's really funny about it that this profession buffoon ended your title reign. I love that you are wearing that shirt now man it's makes me happy. You can say it's using you all you want. If anything it's me showing everyone that to me your a joke Jake. Nothing you say bothers me at all. No I'm not using you to make money like you love to say. I'm using you to mock you. I'm using your own weak ass insults to mock who you are as a person. NEXT LIE.
Jonny folds the paper into an airplane and flies it away from him and grabs a note card this time. On the back on the note card is says IJC > JED
Jonny - You said and I quote "people don't really care if you're here or not, you've never added anything to the IIW." It's so funny you point that out Jake because Netflix wanted Jonny C. Thats the main reason I was I was first to get a call. Osh doesn't need to call me he knows I will just show up. He needed to call me first because Netflix CEO Ted Sarandos specifically asked for me to be on the roster. I know that name because we went out to a nice dinner. He wanted to get to know me. It was a lovely time I must say. I had the lobster thermador. So yet again a storyline you have constructed in your head is complete trash. THEY CALL ME GAMBIT.
Jonny tries spectacularly unsuccessfully to whip the note card at a wall. He shrugs and grabs another note card. On the back on this note card is just a drawing of the middle finger.
Jonny - Legacy is something you touch on quite a bit. How I'm the "face" of IIW. I guess that bothers you a bit that I am the face. You love to bring that up. Almost as much as I do Jake. You also seem to really belive I do things for attention. Again your not listening to what's being said. First reading and now listening. I have stated from day 1 that I do things I find fun. I have never once done anything in my life for the attention of others. Now you see the things I do will gain attention that I know but I have never done them because of it. They are outlandish things that I find enjoyment in doing. People also seem to find enjoyment and that's great for them. Not everyone is a boring stick in the mud like you. People enjoy who I am Jake, they like to see what I will do next. I have heard it my whole life. That's not what drives me to do things though. I don't care what people think of me. You can say otherwise but that's not true. If I think it's fun and I could enjoy it I will try it. Yes I drive a tank from time to time because who the hell wouldn't want to drive a tank. ON TO THE NEXT INACCURACY.
Jonny folds note card into an origami swan. Jonny flaps his wings and tries to fly it away. He picks up another sheet of lie filled paper. On the back of this one it says Jake has tiny balls.
Jonny - Yes Jake is do call this my Passion. I have worked harder than anyone else to ever set foot in this ring. You can see it as the life's work of a profession buffoon but again that's just inaccurate. I have won titles in every single federation I have ever been in. I have held every single title in the IIW some more than once. I am constantly at the top of my game and headlining shows and P....P....V. Look at the level of talent we are working with right now Jake and try to tell me it's not the best roster you have ever been involved with. From the bottom to the top we are stacked with talent. You and I are the ones main eventing we are the go home spot on the P.....P.....V no one else. Yes I belive I am the best in the IIW, even better than you Jake. This is absolutely my passion and just because I have fun doing it doesn't take away from my skill set. Whatever you need to convince yourself to sleep at night Jake. I have more passion for wrestling in my pinky finger than you have in your whole body Jake. I love wrestling more that anyone or anything else in this world and I have an absolute blasty blast doing it. That's why I'm so God damn good in the ring. It's not only a passion is my love. ON TO THE NEXT ONE.
Jonny crumples the paper and shoots it like a basket ball into the trash bin. Jonny picks up another piece of paper. On the back it says Jake < Sky Squad
Jonny - You said and I quote "you don't care about quality or legacy or being viewed as the best ever." Again Jake that's completely made up horse malarkey. I care about all of those things and I care deeply. The quality of my in ring ability is better than yours will ever be and I'm tired of you thinking it's not. I have out wrestled you once before and i will do it again come KKND. You will see what top quality looks like that's for damn sure. I also know that my legacy in professional wrestling will be far greater than yours and my name will be rememberd far longer. You're a dick Jake. A wanna be tough guy that has some talent in the wrestling ring. Yes we all know it's true. For 13 years we have been doing this back and forth now. You always say I'm not that good but yet again here I am in the main event with you. You always call me a clown but im the most decorated clown to ever walk down an entrance ramp. You will find out first hand at the a P....P....V just how high quality I can be.
Jonny tosses the paper to the side and picks up one more. This one says Jake is a sad pathetic man.
Jonny - This next bit is my favorite. You threw out a ton of rapid fire lies. A machine gun of dishonesty. I will breakdown my breakdown of your ridiculousness. You're calling my career highlights into question. Saying the wrestling world is small. Maybe for a jack off like you it is but not for me. I got people reaching out to me every single day from feds all over the world. There are literally hundreds no thousands of options. Yet once more you took the truth and you changed it all up to bennifet yourself Jake. Last week I didn't lose a title match. A title was stolen from me due to outside interference. There is a huge difference there. It took 3 people to beat me in that match. I would say I'm doing pretty good over there as well. I beat your boy Balde Alexander in a match for 50k and its looks like I will be beating him again tomorrow night. Yeah I'm doing pretty good there.
Jonny takes a sip of water.
Jonny - Let's talk about the claim I got run out of a fed for being a drama queen. See thats just completely fabricated. Jay Vaughan and myself walked away from that fed on our own. We where not kicked out. No fed has ever kicked Jonny C out that's bad for business. Project Honor was a trash fed that we left because it wasn't up to our level. We left and got recruited by other feds because for us the wrestling world isn't small. People like me Jake, they want me to work for them. They know how good I am and they need that raw talent on their cards. Yes everyone yet again Jake has completely made up a story to fit the storyline he has created. You see that's all you got Jake. You need to make up these lies about me because you have nothing else. I honestly belive you are scared of me. Sure you beat me a couple times in the last decade. You know I went and looked it up you really haven't beaten me all that often. We didn't wrestle nearly as much as I thought we had. Anyway yes I belive you are scared. The last time we met in that ring for a title I won it. When the match counted I delivered. Deep down you know I will do it again. Thats why you feel the need to cook up this ridiculous lies about me. That's the worst part your story's have so many holes in them they look like Swiss cheese. Do you actually belive the lies you tell Jake. That could be a sign of a larger problem. I know a guy that can help you.
Jonny rips the paper up into little squares and throws it in the air. He picks up another piece on the back it says Jake = Douche.
Jonny - Can everyone belive there is more bullshit in this promo. You see again Jake spins the truth and makes it his own. I think you should work for Trump man he loves spinning the truth almost as much as you. You went on and on how I'm begging you to end me. You actually think that you can end me Jake. It's clear to us all that you can't. There is no reality where you can end me. You have been trying for years Jake and it hasn't taken yet. I'm not begging you to end anything. I'm rubbing in that you can finish the job and say what you will it bothers you. I keep getting up and coming back for more. I will always get up and keep coming at you. You claim you have grown up and don't want to do this dance with me forever. You haven't changed Jake. You're exactly the same person you where 13 years ago. Get off your high horse guy. You need this win more than I do. I have beaten you for the big one before you have yet to do that. I want this win because I want the title. Regardless of what you say I'm the face of IIW. You know what I've done by fact checking you Jake? I have shown everyone that you're a bold faced lier. Nothing you say should ever be taken on face value becasue it's almost guerenteed to be complete crap. I could go on and on with more lies but you started repeating your prior statements alot. You hate me, you will end me, my new shirt, I'm not the face of IIW and so on. Your second act was very similar to your first.
Jonny takes the rest of the paper and tosses it into the ground.
Jonny - Now it's my turn. I'm going to drop a truth bomb. Something so honest it will never be disputed. Yes Jake you beat me in matches that didn't matter at all. Yet when it was all on the line 13 years ago I beat you. I rose to the occasion and did what I said I was going to do and that was beat you for the title. You choked man, you couldn't do what you needed to. Call me big match Jonny because I took your title in a 3 way match. I outlasted 2 men and took home the biggest prize in the IIW. You have never beaten me on such a grand stage. Spoiler alert you never will Jake. You got to the mountain top and I kicked your ass off it. We are climbing to that mountain top again but this time i will stop you from ever getting there. You have never beaten me for the world title Jake. That's something that I'm sure eats you up inside. No matter how good you think you are you haven't done it all yet. This is the most truth that I can speak. When you needed to step your game up and beat me you couldn't. You fell short, that has to hurt. I on the other hand knew what needed to be done and did that flawlessly and took your title. I'm good at taking titles from you Jake. You're good at giving me titles. Remember that Jake the last time we met for a title you handed it to me.
Jonny takes his hair and let's it down. He pours some water on it and shakes it free.
Jonny - Jake you're a sad little man. I have figured it out. You have nothing else in your life. You think I want to be you so bad. I don't man your life sucks. Pretty soon you will be the man who lost 2 titles to Jonny C. Nobody wants to be that man except me Jonny C. You can have all your wins over me I don't care. Oh wait sorry you told everyone I really do care so I guess maybe I do. I will keep the title win and move on to take one more. We are just about a week away from the most embarrassing night of your life. This is the week that yet again you will lose out on a title because of me. We all saw what happened 13 years ago. Osh put it on the greatest hits of IIW so everyone has seen it. Everyone has seen me pin you. What no one else has seen is you pin me. Yes it's happened we all know it but I guess none of them have been big enough deals to be replayed. When I want something I will stop at nothing to get it. I want that title Jake. I want it in a bad way. That's why I keep saying you can't end me. You're going to need to beat me lifeless to pin me for that title and you just aren't good enough to do that.
Jonny takes his tie off and throws it onto the papers on the ground.
Jonny - You can and will come out here and go on and on about God knows what because it's all false. You have fabricated this story line in your head that you are light-years ahead of me in that ring Jake. That's fine you keep believing that because we all its not true. Yes you have beaten me but when it counted I took home the win #neverforget. You really are a pathetic man Jake. That title is as good as mine come the P......P.....V there is nothing you can do about it. It's my time now I have beaten you for the title in the past and I will be doing it again at KKND. Now we all know you will be coming back out here sitting in the seats with your arms spread out and spewing filth. My biggest question is do you really belive everything you say Jake. I mean you can really belive all that crap. If you do your absolutely delusional. Well that would make sense.
Jonny unbuttons the neck of his shirt.
Jonny - I could address how the IIW closeing wasn't my fault again but I have done that already. Jake is like a 3 trick pony. He will go on and on about the same 2 or 3 things because that's all he has in life. Its sad really but hey that's on him not me. He will come out and tell everyone I'm a clown, he has beaten me many times, we won't do this forever, he hates me, I really do care what people think, I love attention and so on and so forth. Some combination of that crap that he has already said a million times. Watch any promo he has cut on me in the last 13 years. It's must be some kind of template he uses cause its all the same crap. I just see right though it. We all see through it Jake. You got one more promo to do but I could just rewatch the last 2 because it will be exactly the same as they are you unoriginal ass clown. Where do we go from here? Thats what everyone is waiting to find out huh. That's what the world wants to know. Well i don't know about this we business what I do know is I will become the new world champion of the IIW. I know I will win at KKND that's just fact not some Jake bullshit. I'm fully ready to take what's mine and show everyone I'm the real face of the IIW. The new face of Netflix oh I like that one quite a bit. Now I want everyone to wait with baited breath like I will to see how the spin master Jake will take what I said and fabricate some elaborate tale of trash. We can all hardly wait to see what the wonderful world of Jake E Dangerously will present us with next. Stay tuned folks its sure to be good.
Jonny takes the note cards left on his podium and places them in his pocket. He stands and salutes the camera as the scene fades to black. |
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Post by Jake E Dangerously on Mar 14, 2021 16:53:50 GMT
Ever notice how everyone can get access to anything in IIW these days? It's like every promo or ever segment someone is just getting into something they shouldn't be. Take this for example, this doesn't look right, Jake E Dangerously sitting at the desk of Osh Vaughn. Jake: That's weird, it says Pay Per View but it's streaming on Netflix at the exact same time as ll our other shows. I guess TECHNICALLY you pay for Netflix, so all ours shows are Pay Per View, but it's not carried by your conventional Pay Per View providers. It's almost like Osh is so used to slapping that on his big cards that he's just doing it still, but far be it for me to actually look around and do research on more than one thing to prove a point. It says Pay Per View on this one little piece of paper, so Jonny Almighty must be right.
I'm gonna call him Jonny Almighty now because he knows everything. How else would he know that one guy was going to get in this office actually and take the World Title and make our not Pay Per View match for the World Title before it happened? It's not like falling ass backwards into being right isn't his MO or anything. But let's give him the benefit because frankly I'm starting to worry for his mental health.
He sits back and puts his feet up on Osh's desk. Jake: I know it's weird my being in here right? I don't think I've ever even been in this office before. But you know, back to Jonny Almighty's mental health. Maybe it's a case of absolute power corrupting? Where else would he come up with some of this stuff he talks about, like beating “my boy” for fifty thousand? What boy? What fifty grand? For a guy that knows so much you seem to have some crazy conspiracies theories floating through that head Jonny. That have anything to do with whatever stable of guys you were talking about before? You're losing your grip, man.
For instance, I never said you said there wasn't a third man in our match years ago. And fuck you for making that word soup a sentence I actually had to say. I'm sorry people at home if I have to repeat myself sometimes, but as you all well know Jonny C is a thick boy and it often takes a lot of repetition for him to understand certain simple concepts, like when I said that no one remembered a third man because he was pretty much irrelevant.
He looks around at all the event posters and what not that Osh has on his walls. Jake: You know, I kind of thought this office would be bigger.
But back to Jonny Almighty's delusions for a minute. Sure you can spare the proceeds from one shirt to COVID relief and that's all well and good, it does save you face not having to pay me royalties out of it. But come on Jonny, you don't need the money? You've been slumming it in every small time indy you can find. Sure you're good today, but I've already pointed out how you can't hang onto a dollar. You're also still hanging onto the desperate idea that you're called first over something other than contractual obligation. You're always the first to sign on Jonny, because you have no life. First called or not you're the one that jumps on and signs on again the second Osh rings you up because you never found anything better to do with your life that wait by the phone for that call.
I know you impressed us all by knowing the name of the CEO of Netflix, but so does everyone who can use Google. It's 2021 Jonny, that stuff is public knowledge. Personally I've never met the guy, but then again I didn't have to take him out to a fancy dinner to sweet talk him into letting me be a part of IIW on Netflix. I've never been one to wine and dine big wigs because my name and my work speak for itself. Oh, I know you'll try to turn that around Jonny, but people with iron clad lifetime contracts don't get sweet talked by management, they get told where to be and when to be there. You can re-frame it any way you want, you always do, but that's the sad truth. Everyone knows you picked up the check from that dinner, and it had nothing to do with some money you won in some little independent promotion.
Among the many crazy things on Osh's walls are a few “Promoter of the Year” awards. They don't seem to specifically mention who awarded them, but there they are. Jake: That's weird. It' almost like Osh is trying to tell himself that over and over so it'll make it true, much like what Jonny Almighty does. You know Jonny, there's a pretty noticeable difference between doing things that ARE fun, like hoping in the ring and having a wrestling match, and things that you think will look fun, like driving a tank. Yes, I do keep referring to you as the “face” of IIW, because that's exactly how you refer to yourself, often, even though no one else has or will. And I know this is a high-brow concept for you, but that because it's a framing device. I used it as a point of reference that you will understand because that's the kind of hand holding you need to understand things. Things like when fans come up to you and say “I really liked your match, Jonny” with a smirk on their face. You just think to yourself that “oh, I feel really good about myself, I put a smile on that fan's face” when you can't register sarcasm when it's directed at you.
Everyone who's ever met you Jonny knows you've been living in your own little bubble, and being in a bubble it has distorted your view of the world around you. You've been living in it so long all you see now is the world you want to, not as it really is. That's why your entire last promo was editing the things I said to fit your world view. No one really cares to see what you'll do next Jonny, you're not that interesting and fun. Different and good are not synonyms. In the same way saying something over and over again doesn't make it true.
Actually thinking about your last promo again... I'm pretty sure you don't know the letters PPV stand for Pay Per View. After all, why keep saying the letters PPV over and over again. No one says that, they say Pay Per View. The only possible reason to say PPV over Pay Per View is that you don't know what those letters mean.
But let's get onto that passion there, Jonny. That passion you think you have, that you have over everyone else here. Sure you work harder than most guys because wrestling doesn't come as easy to you. It's not about passion, it's about ability. You have to work three times harder to be half as good, and there's no shame in that, but it doesn't mean you have more passion. You claim you have fun, but do you really Jonny? Sure I know you get a kick out of cutting promos, I'll give you that. They're a fun little outlet where you can throw out any stupid idea that comes into your head and for a few minutes you get to be the centre of attention and have everyone focus on you.
He takes his feet off Osh's desk and leans forward, elbows on whatever paperwork Osh leaves out. Doodles of body parts mainly. Jake: That's what you're most passionate about Jonny, being the character Jonny C. Not about wrestling, and it shows. If you actually loved wrestling you'd think about it for even a second and not about yourself. That's the big difference Jonny C, that's why we've never gotten along. I see right through your little bubble, I see all the time you twist the truth to make yourself look good, and I see the holes in all the lies you tell yourself.
So let's have a real talk about passion for a minute. You talk about all the other guys on the roster now, mostly because I brought them up, but what about them Jonny? You love this and are so passionate, but you don't really give a shit about any single one of them and you never will. Sure you tell yourself you do, and on the surface you do as long as they don't take your spot in the main event, but that's as far as it goes for you. You'd put every single one of them out of a job and IIW back out of business again if it meant you could have another moment of passion and tell someone else's kid that you're their real dad or some other shitty “storyline” you spend most of your time here thinking up.
If you spend all of your time whining in the principal's office sooner or later you're going to overhear a thing or two about running a school, but it wont make you superintendent. If you had the passion you claim you'd see the bigger picture, Jonny. You're mired in doing what's fun, and that's not passion, that's fun. Sometimes I get to do fun stuff, like my talk show, but I haven't got to do that in years. Sometimes though I have to do something that's not fun, but I do it anyway because it helps what I am passionate about. That's wrestling Jonny. You feed us that old line about winning title where ever you go like saying it over and over makes it true, but in reality you don't, just like you say you have passion, but you don't.
I said before how you work so hard because you have to and time and time again I point that out. You hate that I keep pointing out how much better in the ring that I am than you because you know it's true. We see it on your face and we hear it in your voice Jonny, it's eaten you alive for YEARS that you've beaten me ONCE, and I've beaten you so many times I've lost count. It eats you up that every time you think you've reached the top there I am, but you beat me that one time, so you wallow knowing that you managed it once but haven't ever been able to put your finger on why you couldn't do it again.
Let me tell you why. Once upon a time you used to be young and passionate. You really believed all those things you said. No one had yet destroyed the lies you put on yourself, but that was a long time ago. Long before you started to imagine conspiracies where none exist, before you had to distort your life to protect yourself. That time was ever before you won the IIW World Title Jonny, back when you had both potential and passion. You dreamed you could be the best, not just in IIW but in the wrestling world as a whole. You dreamed of being IIW Champion, but unfortunately for you that dream because reality.
In that reality you ended the greatest IIW World Title reign that there ever was, and you figured that made you the best. On paper it did Jonny. You became the man. But you couldn't handle it. You crumbled under the weight of your own success and so did IIW. That was your undoing Jonny. That's the block you've never gotten past. Over the years since you've mentally unravelled to a point where you're just a shadow of the man you used to be. It why you've sold yourself so deep into thinking the things everyone else has said about you are lies.
You NEED the narrative that I've been trying to end your career for years because it's the only story you can tell where you have success. You have to tell this success story to make yourself the hero of your own little lie. The lie you based your career on. Almost fourteen years ago you beat me for the IIW World Championship to end my historic reign, but look at what it has done Jonny. It didn't impact my career, but it derailed yours. Now you have this feather in your cap and that's good, but I'm still regarded as the best ever, while you have the reputation as IIW's worst World Champion.
Since then I've gone on to beat you a bunch of times. It's included successfully defending other titles against you too. I see you forget that, but I had this whole run where I won the International Title and went unbeaten until you did something else embarrassing and we had to close IIW again. I watched you fail to win the IIW World Champion from Shawn Taylor, but you need to tell the story of the one time you beat me so you can save face and be the centre of attention.
I didn't have to beat you then Jonny, and history has proven that. I already held the World Title longer than you ever could and was a better champion than you ever have been. That's not a matter of opinion, that's fact. How's that for a truth bomb Jonny? The only thing losing to you that once did was end my title reign. It set a bar that in more than a decade since no one has been able to match. That's all I did. It's not about the titles elsewhere, it's all about the right here in IIW.
You say I'm the same as I was thirteen years ago because that's who you need me to be Jonny. You need me to be that arrogant champion sitting at the tail end of a historic reign with my attention drawn away by personal tragedy so that you can feel like we're still there. You said stop living in the past Jonny, well take your own advice. I've been out and stepped away from the game, I got perspective, grew as a person and grew as a performer. The one thing I haven't gotten is worse, Jonny. You stagnated. You think you're different but you're telling the same jokes and having the same “fun” we've all seen from you before. You're a broken record skipping over and over and we all know the lyrics.
But this isn't years ago Jonny. The difference now is I actually DO need to beat you for the IIW World Championship. Tell yourself I can't. Hang onto the notion that you beat me for the title that one time, and cling onto the slim hope that I can't do it again. Believe in your very core that the IIW World Championship makes all the difference because I can tell you it doesn't. But cling to it Jonny, I know how much that prize means to you. You need that belt it's the last thing you cling onto just to prove you're the best. That's your validation.
But let me tell you the one truth you need to listen to. It was never about the IIW World Championship. That title doesn't prove I'm the best, I prove I'm the best. The promo I cut when IIW reopened it's doors that kicked off this tournament and lit a fire under everyone who came back and drew in all this new talent who want a shot prove I'm the best. The promos I cut against Curtis showing to this day that I'm still the heart and soul of this company, of this business prove I'm the best. Worker harder than you everyone else all you want Jonny, all you've ever gotten out of it was a belt. Win, lose or draw against you at KKND I'm STILL going to be the best.
But keep on being you and living in your bubble Jonny. Keep living in the fairy tale land where I'm a boring stick in the mud and you're the fun one so that makes you better. Live in a world where you're just here to entertain and put a smile on people's faces and you think being IIW's equivalent to The Wiggles makes you the best. Meanwhile I'll get down in the muck and do the dirty work that's actually needed to keep changing with this business and maybe not always give the people what they want but keep giving them what they need, what IIW needs, and what wrestling needs to keep going.
That's what passion is Jonny, it's not always getting to do what you want, but doing what needs to be done sometimes just so you can keep that thing you're passionate about. I'm not really looking forward to facing you at KKND, and I don't think that surprises anyone Jonny, but it's one of those things I have to do. You'll tell yourself what you need to as you always do. You'll tell yourself I fear you, I can't beat you for a title, that I need to be you, that I'm trying to destroy you for some reason, but all of that is bullshit.
I'm not looking forward to facing you Jonny because I've done it a LOT. I'm getting a bit tired of the same thing over and over. I know, you think it's because I want you dead but you wont die, but it's because of the narrative Jonny. You haven't moved forward in years and it's the same thing time and time again. I point out the lies you tell yourself to get by, and you say no but you. Look at your whole last promo Jonny. It's all you did. I said you rewrite history to suit you and all you did was say “no you do” and said the same things you always say over and over. You said stop living in the past, but it's because so much of it makes you look bad. Meanwhile you live in the past of that one match from well over a decade ago. You say you're so important to IIW when all you've actually ever done is tear it down and I'm sick and tired of it. You claim I go on about the same things over and over when they are simple things that have happened that need pointing out because you refuse their existence. And time after time people hear what I say and look at the evidence and see what I'm saying is true. I'm tired of going around and around in the exact same circles with the exact same guy I started out with years ago. I'm tired of the guy who talks the biggest game and backs it up with his worst. You can't carry this business Jonny, and I'm tired of watching you try.
Now you're trying to add this extra layer of “breaking the fourth wall” or imagining I'm in league with people I've never actually met and have nothing to do with, your sanity is cracking Jonny. You're falling apart mentally. This is what happens when you tell yourself lies for so long and they all start to unravel in your hands in the face of indisputable truth.
The indisputable truth is this Jonny, I need to beat you for the IIW World Championship at KKND, but not to prove I'm the best ever, not to spite you, but to hold this company together. To show everyone there's a champion worth facing, to show everyone that IIW is back as a legitimate power in wrestling, and to show everyone there's hope for the future. I need to be better than you on one night to undue fourteen years of mistakes I kicked off a long time ago and to do it all I have to beat one of the self-proclaimed “best in the world”, but you know what's funny Jonny, if you're ever going to beat me again now's the time. You remember how you did it once long ago? You beat me at my best then? When I was the hottest thing in this business on the hottest run I've ever had. Now's you're shot Jonny. You're one chance to shut me up and all you have to do is beat a guy that's had exactly one match in the last nine years.
He shrugs, because how else can you plainly state things. He runs his hands across the desk to push himself to stand, but stops. Reaching under the edge of Osh's desk he pulls out something that looks suspiciously like a listening device. Jake: Oh... Well this is interesting.
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Post by JonnyFNC on Mar 15, 2021 17:56:41 GMT
American Nightmare is heard playing. The theme song for the Howard Stern Show.
Howard Stern - Hey now everybodyyyyyy. Welcome back to the show. We are going to break the mold a little bit and have a wrestler on next.
Robin - Are we really? We haven't done that in a long time Howard. It's definitely a change of pace.
Howard - Yes I know Robin that's why I decided to do it. I don't normally have wrestlers on becssue I'm not a huge fan but our guest has been doing some really big things lately. He signed a deal to have live wrestling on Netflix for the first time ever.
Robin - Wow that is huge. How did he manage to sign that deal?
Howard - Well he didn't sign it himself his boss did but he is the featured player for the wrestling promotion so he had a lot to do with Netflix wanting to sign them. He is also headlining the first ever PPV next week in the world title match.
Robin - It's called main eventing not headline Howard.
Howard - How would I know I don't watch the stuff Robin I just know this guy is a big deal.
Robin - Well bring him on zoom Howard come on don't keep up waiting. We are dying to know who it is.
Howard - WHOA Robin keep it in your pants. There will be enough of this guy to go around.
Robin - Well Howard as we have seen in the past most wrestlers are in great shape and very good looking. It's a body business you know.
Howard - That is is Robin. Trust me this guy will light a fire in between your legs. Ladies and Gentlemen Infamous Jonny C.
Jonny C pops up on the main screen in Howard's studio.
Howard - Jonny thanks for being her today.
Robin - Oh Howard you where right he is a very attractive man.
Jonny - Thanks for having me Howard. Right back at you Robin, the pleasure is all mine. Hi Fred I see you back there too.
Howard - Nobody cares about Fred Jonny you're a super fan you know that.
Jonny - Fred is my favorite part of the show Howard.
Howard - So I see here you have a huge match coming up next week. At Krush Kill N Destroy you're facing Jake E Dangerously for the IIW world title. Do I have that correct?
Jonny - Yes you do. Next Sunday is first PPV back for the IIW and yes of course I'm main eventing the show.
Howard - I see that it's a return to PPV for the IIW. So the IIW was closed untill recently?
Jonny - Yes it was. It closed about 4 or 5 years ago. Some bad business deals and alot of talent jumped ship. It sucked man. You hate to see a wrestling promotion close its doors especially one near and dear to my heart.
Howard - Now I was told the owner signed you to a lifetime contract. Did you still get paid during the time it was closed. That's got to be a huge weight off you. You never need to worry about re signing a deal. You know every 5 years I need to enter negotiations and argure about money and scheduling stuff. It's not full at all but you found a way to cut all of that out. Tell me about it.
Jonny - Ah the lifetime contract ha ha. Yes Osh the owner never missed a payment to me. It was my downside guerentee but it was still good money. I didn't really need it though as I was steadily working for other promostions all over the world. The lifetime contract has been a hot button issue lately though. Jake is very concerned about it. He claims I was the one who forced IIW to close its doors because of that contract.
Howard - How can one man be the reason a whole federation closing? Also why would someone else be so concerned about your money. That is just silly. No one actually believes that. Plus judging by my records wasn't Jake employed at the time of closeing?
Jonny - Yes Howard he was employed at the time of closing. Something he always forgets to disclose when spewing his lies. But the narrative isn't as good if he can't blame solely me for the closing. I know it adds to his fairytale but everyone can see right through it just like you did. He keeps harping on the aleged fact the closing was my fault but it was so clearly not at all.
Howard - I have run a business now for many years and I can tell you and all the fans listening it's never one person's fault when something closes. If it does boil down to one man or woman it's the owner who deserves the blame. Now back to this lifetime contract we got sidetracked on that.
Jonny - Years ago Osh who owns the IIW realized that I was a once in a lifetime talent. I have held every title in the company and won every type of match. He saw how over I was with the fans.
Howard - What does being over mean?
Jonny - Over means popular. The fans like you if your over. Over with the fans if you will. It's surprising to becssue I'm not really considered a good guy. I'm more of a heel or bad guy. So when Osh saw how over I was along with all my other accolades he knew he needed me locked in forever. He couldn't afford to lose me to anyone else full time. Yeah it sounds cocky but it's the truth
Howard - You know your worth.
Jonny - I absolutely do. Osh has taken care of me and I will always be loyal to IIW. Even without the lifetime contract I would have returned. Its home to me it's my comfort zone.
Howard - I fully understand that. Before Covid my studio was my comfort zone but it's a bit different now. Either way sitting behind this microphone is home for me. Now you guys signed with Netflix that's a huge deal. First time ever live events have been broadcast on their platform.
Jonny - Man that Netflix deal is huge for us. It will turn so many new people onto us. I'm so pumped that they took the chance on us. Making the IIW the first live show to air on Netflix is scary but it will push us to be at our best. It's certainly pushing me to give it my all. They have a multi million user subscription base and I like to belive that every single one if them will be turning in to watch us.
Robin - Jonny I read in the news you had dinner with Ceo of Netflix Ted Sarandos. He is quoted as saying he believes you are the face of the company.
Jonny - Robin im not only three face of the IIW I'm now the face of Netflix. We did got out to dinner. He wanted to met me becasue as he pointed out to me in his eyes I am the face of IIW. Suck on that one Jake. The CEO sees me as the face. We went to your favorite restaurant Nobu Howard we had a great meal.
Howard - You will always have a great meal there.
Jonny - We had a get to know you session. He seems like a really down to earth guy and seems very interested in the wrestling business. He wanted to know some of the in and outs and what drives us. He also asked alot about the wrestling business and how it operates.
Howard - What does drive you?
Jonny - Being the best to ever step foot into a wrestling ring. That's it nothing more nothing less. Not about money or the love from the fans. I don't care about that at all. I want to be the best.
Howard - Didn't even have to think about it.
Jonny - Nope not at all. I have loved wrestling since before I could remember. It's all I ever wanted to do and I have done it all Howard. I absolutely love what I do and I am at the top of the industry. Just look at me I'm cut like a Greek God, I have the mic skills to kill you before the match and my talent in the ring is second to none. I am the best in the world at what I do.
Howard - Well there it is.
Jonny - A man once said It aint bragging if you back it up and I sure as hell back it up.
Howard - Not for nothing you do talk a really good game. It does take a different caliber of person to step into a wrestling ring and put your life on the line as often as you do.
Jonny - Can't think of it like that at all. I could be walking across the street to get some food and get hit by a bus tomorrow. I don't like to live life fearing anything. I won't let fear control me. I'm very fun loving guy. Jake is actully very on me for not being more serious. He thinks becasue all I I want to do is have fun that makes me weaker in the ring. That couldn't he further from the truth. I honestly think me having fun and loving what I do makes me far more dangerous in the ring.
Howard - I might agree with him on that one. I'm a very serious person myself.
Jonny - There is nothing wrong with being serious. When I need to be I absolutely am. Tomorrow isn't promised to us. Everything could end today. That's why I try to have as much fun as possible. I don't care what anyone thinks of me because this is my life and I will live it the way I want to. Jake tells everyone I secretly do seek attention from everyone else. He is just wrong on so many levels.
Howard - Deep down do you seek the attention of everyone? We all look for validation from someone.
Jonny - No not even deep down. I care about being the best. The only person I seek validation from is myself. I hold myself to the highest of standards. When I lose a match I don't care if I get booed, I don't care if I get a low payout. I care about learning from what I did wrong and getting better. I care about being the best in the IIW. Shit I drove a tank from time to time because I always wanted a tank. Clearly I don't care what anyone especially Jake thinks about me.
Howard - Wait you own a tank? Thats just ridiculous.
Jonny - It really is. It's a whole lot of fun though. It's a freaking tank why wouldn't you want to own one.
Howard - The Main event of Krush Kill N Destroy is Jake E Dangerously VS you for the IIW world title.
Jonny - Yes it is. 13 years in the making as well. It's going to be huge Howard. No one has ever seen a feud build for this long.
Howard - Damn 13 years. You guys must really hate eachother.
Jonny - Yes I hate Jake with every fiber of my being. He is everything I hate in a person. The worst of the worst for sure. I also know hates me. He hates that someone like me is as good as I am.
Howard - Someone like you?
Jonny - He has regularly referred to me as a buffoon, a clown and a joke. What does that say about him seeing as I beat him for the world title 13 years ago. He can't stand that I am in the main event with him. I am the bane of his existence and I love that. We are 2 completely different people but that's why we have been locked in constant battle.
Howard - 13 years is a really long time.
Jonny - That's true. Now yes it's been 13 years but there has been alot of really long breaks. Once IIW closed we didn't work with eachother the whole time. When IIW is running full steam we aren't always wrestling eachother. So yeah 13 years but it's hasn't been a consistent stream of matches.
Howard - How did it all start with you guys 13 years ago.
Jonny - Jake was the IIW world champion for a record 90 days. That may not seem like a long time but in our world that's an eternity. I won the right to challenge for the title in a triple threat match. James Morgann, Jake and I did battle and in the end I hit my finish on Jake and pinned him for the 1...2...3. I said I was going to beat Jake for the title and end his lengthy reign and I did. I could have taken the easy way out and pinned James but I knew I needed to beat Jake or I never would have heard the end of it. If I wanted to be the man I needed to beat the man.
Howard - Wait, you already beat Jake for a world title 1e years ago?
Jonny - Yes I did. The one time we wrestled for the world title I beat him and claimed the title he had been holding. I also ended his long title reign. Something that I know bothers him to this day.
Howard - I can absolutely see why that would bother someone. You work your whole life to get to the top of your industry and it gets taken away by someone you think is less than you are.
Jonny - That's another thing Jake likes to tell everyone. He loves telling everyone I am less than he is. Frankly it drives me insane. I beat Jake for the world fucking title. I hit the F'N point and pinned him to the mat and ended his run with the belt. Yet somehow in his head he is still better than I am. He has spun this web of lies about how he is better than I am and most people seem to belive that. Yet for 13 years who has been standing in Jake's way. Infamous Jonny C that's who. He can say and do whatever he wants but facts are facts.
Howard - Sounds like you're really fired up about this.
Jonny - I definitely am. I am looked at as the underdog going into the match next week. The fucking underdog. That makes me sick I have done everything there is to do in the world of wrestling. I won all the matches of the tournament to earn this title match. My goal coming back to IIW was to be the best here. All I wanted to do was become the champion and put IIW on the map. Now my goals have changed.
Howard - That doesn't sound good at all for Jake.
Jonny - No no it's all good. I still want to be the best and become the champion but I also want to absolutely bury Jake. Winning the title should have been sweet enough but beating Jake for the title makes it oh so much sweeter. Mark my words Howard I will become the world champion at KKND. All I have ever wanted to do is be the best wrestler on the planet. I used to build wrestling rings in my backyard out of pallets and tires. This has been my dream for as long as I can remember. It's my time to shine again. That title is coming home. This is my life and it means way more to me than it ever will to Jake.
Robin - Hasn't Jake beaten you a bunch of times since you beat him for the world title?
Jonny - Yeah Robin he has beaten me a few times. That means nothing though. He couldn't get the job done when it mattered most and history will repeat itself Sunday. Sure he beat me in some bullshit nothing matches that didn't matter at all. When push came to shove and the fat lady was singing I was the one standing tall holding the title.
Robin - He learned how to beat you though. You haven't beaten him since that day.
Howard - Robin go easy. It's clearly a tough subject for Jonny.
Jonny - It's fine Howard its true. Jake did what he needed to do and learned to beat me. He learned really well to. He got pretty good at beating me to be honest. I could sit here and tell you this time it's going to be different, I'm more ready now than I have ever been. All of that is true but I am a man of action. I will let my work in the ring prove what I already know. I am better than Jake E Dangerously.
Howard - Throwing down a gauntlet for sure.
Jonny - As much as I think Jake and I will be doing this forever. I do plan to always be a thorn in Jake's side but it's time for me to end this once and for all. I love the dance but I'm ready to let someone else cut in and take Jake for a spin. I need to be the one to finish this. Jake has been trying to end my career for years and he hasn't been able to yet. I will admit he hates me way more than I hate him.
Howard - Does he?
Jonny - Absolutely he does. I live in his head rent free and I freaking love that. He can't keep himself from running his mouth about me. He calls it spying but it's really just being observant. We are all in the same group chat and he loves taking potshots every chance he can. He can't keep my name out of his mouth. I honestly think even though he has beaten me a few times he is still not over losing the title to me. Yeah sure a few wins in great but I got the ultimate trump card for sure. How did our title match end? Thats all I need to ask and it shuts any conversation down.
Howard - So you're here today to announce to the world you will be beating Jake for the world title next week.
Jonny - Yes Howard I am. The blood feud that's been 13 years in the making writes another chapter next weekend. Different but the same because it's 13 years apart but the outcome will be the same. Me taking the world title and pinning Jake. You know I beat one of his closest friends yesterday. Granted I don't think Blade gave it his all but a win is a win. I would have loved to face Blade at 100% but I will take what I can get.
Howard - So if you win the title on Sunday.
Jonny - Come on Howard its not if it's when.
Howard - I'm sorry When you win the title on Sunday what's next. Once you close this Jake chapter what's next for Infamous Jonny C.
Jonny - As much as I would love to say we will be closing this chapter I know we won't. Jake and I are far from done. I hate him Yes but I know how good he is. I respect his in ring talent. He is one of the greatest of all time. I am man enough to admit that. I know we will meet for the title again down the line it's inevitable.
Howard - So what's next is Jake then?
Jonny - Nah not right off the rip. My plan is to be the best champion IIW has ever seen. Bring prestige back to the long dormant title. I will be a fighting champion, taking on all challengers. Winning the title is one thing but keeping it is another. You know what my biggest goal is going to be with the title? I want to beat Jake's run with it. Not only do I want to beat him for the the title I want to beat his title run. I'm shooting for over 100 days as champion.
Howard - There is no way that's going to be easy.
Jonny - Not at all. If it was easy I wouldn't want to do it. I love a good challenge. Beating Jake won't be easy at all but I know I can do it. Beating him just isn't enough I want to erase his legacy. Legacy is something he loves talking about so I know he holds it near and dear so I plan to take that away. Erase his name from the record books, or at least put his name under mine. That would drive him insane. Lose a title to me then sit back and watch as I hold it for longer than he did. Man that would be fantastic. That's what's next Howard.
Howard - That's a big dream you have.
Jonny - It definitely is but I will make it a reality. I constantly say I want to be the best of all time. So in my eyes winning the title just isn't enough. Everyone can win titles Howard. Holding on to them is where people falter. There is always someone gunning to take the title as soon as you win it.
Howard - Do you know who is next in line for a shot.
Jonny - That's way to hard to predict. The roster in the IIW right now is the best it has ever been. There is so much talent waiting to claim the proverbial brass ring its not even funny. The real question is who is going to be the one to step up.
Robin - Jonny don't get ahead of yourself here you still haven't beaten Jake for the title and you're talking about defending it. Don't count your chickens before they hatch.
Jonny - I know it won't be easy Robin. Beating Jake is going to take everything I have. I will have to dig deep and give it my all to beat him. I know for a fact I have what it take. I'm more ready for this match than I have ever been. I know I know everyone says that but it's true. I already told you I am going to let my actions speak louder than my words. I could sit here and go on and on about how ready I am, how hard I'm training, how much I want this but that all means nothing. The only thing that matters is what I do in that ring at KKND.
Howard - You're right actions do speak louder than words.
Jonny - That they do and I know that. All this talking we have done means nothing in the grand scheme of things. What we say about eachother is just that words. We need to show up at the PPV and give it 100% and wrestle our asses off. It all boils down to who is the better wrestler. Who is more well rounded and can stick to the plan and win the match. I know what my plan is. I know it will be executed 100% the way I need to do it. I will be the better man on Sunday night. Shit I'm always the better man.
Howard - Legacy is a funny thing to think about. I know how I want to be remembered but what about you. You said Jake is always talking about legacy.
Jonny - At the end it doesn't really matter to me. I shouldn't say it like that but it's kind of true. I live my life the way I want to and its the best it can be for me. I guess being remembered is a good thing. Maybe deep down we all want people to remember how good we where. Jake speaks at length on Legecy it's just not something I think about much. I know I'm on the mount Rushmore of wrestlers. So I guess that's how I will be remembered. I care more about tarnishing Jake's legecy than I do about polishing my own.
Howard - I would say this goes back to the attention seeking thing.
Jonny - Maybe it does. Once I'm gone and no longer doing this it's over. I just don't care what someone 25 years from now thinks of me. Good, bad or indifferent. I'm not just saying I don't care for some act it's true. I am who I am like it or not. Jake doesn't like it and can't seem to understand who I am as a person. That's all fine and well because again I don't care. I don't want Jake to like me, I know he never will. We won't ever be drinking buddies. We are different people and that's fine. It's takes many different kinds of people to make this wild world go around.
Howard - You've said it all Jonny. We have touched on Netflix, the closing of IIW, your contract, Jake and legacy. Is there anything else you wanted to touch on before we end this.
Jonny - It's been an honor to be here Howard. You know I'm a huge fan and I thank you for having me on.
Howard - I know I will be firing up Netflix to watch the title match this Sunday night. It sounds like the hate Jake and you share will come to a head and create a can't miss match.
Jonny - It definitely will. Fully expect to see 2 men at the peak of their careers lock up one more title for a title. It will blow the roof off the arena for sure. Just wait for the moment I hit the F'N point and pin him. The arena will come unglued Howard. Also the whole show is stacked. You absolutely need to check check out Keys to success. It's a 6 man ladder match that will be pure chaos. There is also a boiler room brawl match that will definitely not disappoint. Everyone top to bottom will be looking to steal the show and everyone will kill it Sunday night. It's 1000% a can't miss show.
Howard - A boiler room match huh I think I need to see how that is. Sounds like it could be a train wreck but I need to see it.
Jonny - Just don't forget only one match can steal the show. Yes the card is stacked and everyone will try to steal the show but only one can do it. That's my match, I will be doing something spectacular Sunday night. I belive its called putting on a clinic Howard. I will write the blueprint on how to win a wrestling match. It's going to be a sight you just can't miss. My crowning moment holding that title high. Becoming the true Face of IIW and Netflix.
Howard - I was just slipped a note. Jake had mentioned something about you being the real father of the owners son. He said you searched far and wide for someone to prove that. What the hell is going on over there is the IIW?
Jonny - HA HA Curtis. He really is a great kid. Has nothing to do with me because I didn't raise him. Not knowing he was my child. That's a wild story. Yeah I am the father of Osh's son. Jake and I have had a blood feud for what feels like forever so it would make sense he brings that up. Osh and I used to really dislike eachother when I first signed with IIW.
Howard - You hated him so much that you slept with his wife? Thats some wild shit Jonny.
Jonny - One thing lead to another and yes I slept with his wife. I used to drink alot and that played into it huge. I was out of my mind back then and thought sleeping with his wife would be funny so I did. Little did I know 18 or so years down the line it would come out that Curtis was actually my kid. I guess it's kind of cool I have devoted my whole life to wrestling and nothing else so I never had kids. Getting one that's 18 takes alot of the work out of it ha ha.
Howard - Osh never suspected it. He never saw that this Curtis looked like you.
Jonny - No he never did till his wife dropped the bombshell on him. Funny part is Curtis is now a wrestler and works for IIW. He is pretty good I must say. He was raised in a wrestling family and has my blood so it was bound to happen.
Howard - Wait now he works for IIW and may have to wrestle you. If you win the title that would put a target on your back and we could see father vs son.
Jonny - When I win the title there is a real possibility you could see Curtis step up and challenge me. I welcome all challengers regardless of who they are.
Howard - Damn you wrestlers are absolutely crazy.
Jonny - It takes a special person to be a wrestler that's for sure.
Howard - One last question. What does the C stand for I can't find it out anywhere. Have you ever told anyone? Also why don't you have an H in your name. Everyone must get that wrong.
Jonny - Champion
Howard - Does it really?
Jonny - No it doesn't. I tell people it stands for champion, Cash, comedian, or controversial. There are very few people that know this but it is literally just C. There is no meaning. I took it from something I was a fan of back when I was a kid. No one knows what I took it from and I will most likely never tell. It's a secret I will take to the grave whenever that is. There is no H because my given birth name is Jon. No H so I wasn't adding one to my ring name. And yes people add the H all the time. I'm super used to it now though been happening for years.
Howard - Are you sure you don't want to give us the scoop here today on the C.
Jonny - We will go with the C meaning Champion because come Sunday I will win that title and it will be true.
Howard - Do you have any final words for Jake before we close out?
Jonny - Of course I do I'm not known to be a man of few words. Jake the time for talk is over. We have both said everything we have to say. It all comes down the match Sunday night to determine once and for all who is the face of the IIW. I will let my talent speak for itself. I'm glad the match is here I have been itching to get another shot at you. Itching to win the the title and to win it against you makes it so much better. I can't wait to lock up with you yet again. Maybe for the last time but I doubt it highly. This is far from over just another battle in the war. You will learn talk is cheap Jake. Yes I love to talk but I can back up every single word I say. See you in the ring Sunday night.
Howard - Good luck Sunday night Jonny. We will all be watching to see you win that title.
Jonny - Thank you Howard appreciate you having me on to promote the show and my match.
Howard - Coming up next we have whack pack karaoke. Stay tuned we will be back right after this....... |
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