Post by The Celtic Club on Dec 20, 2022 22:16:09 GMT
IIW Netflix was greeted by static before the feed cut to the familiar surroundings of Kline’s Gym. The beat down exercise equipment, the blood and sweat stained mats–this was home for our subject. This was where “The Heir Apparent” Andy Donahue was able to find his inner peace and tranquility.
Andy Donahue: Ice Crown Rumble, win it. That’s all I heard, that’s all Johnnie told me I gotta do for The Celtic Club. So, what is Andy Donahue gonna do? I’m gonna enter that battle royal at number 23, sprint my ass down that ramp, slide into the ring and start throwing all them bitches around like a doll.
Andy smiled, he flexed his right arm exposing his veiny bicep.
Andy Donahue: Ain’t like y’all don’t already know that type of shit is light work for The Heir Apparent. Johnnie Cav hand picked me to be the guy to take over the torch at some point–it might not be right now but you can all rest assured that the day is coming. The day for Andy Donahue to be THE guy in The Celtic Club gets closer and closer with each passing day. And what do I gotta do to get me to that point? I can’t say for sure but I know that it starts with the Ice Crown Rumble.
Andy puffed up his chest and made his pecs dance for the camera.
Andy Donahue: We, as a Club, have our own goals. Johnnie said he’d win the World Championship and he did. We've been saying that those World Tag Team Championships belong to Trigger and myself and that is the exact reason why Johnnie took two of the spots for this battle royal and handed them off to us. Johnnie wants us to get the job done, we want to get the job done and that’s why every son of a bitch in that rumble gotta go up and over the top rope so that either Trigger or myself can make that challenge for those straps that, so far, have come so close but they’ve remained out of our reach It ain’t for a lack of trying, it just wasn’t our time yet. Now, though, I’ve got this feeling flowing through my veins and no it ain’t the pre-workout…that Lit AF gets me right though. This is finally OUR time, this is finally time for The Celtic Club to run wild on the IIW, it’s time for The Club to monopolize all of the top championships in this company.
Andy snorted as if he were a bull and held up a finger and with each of the following sentences he placed up another.
Andy Donahue: Johnnie as World Champion. Myself and Trigger as the World Tag Team Champions and just for shits and giggles, Eoin O’Rourke can take that International Championship from that douchebag J Mont. Oh yeah, speaking of that loud mouth, used tampon from the CCPE–I guess you’ve got your eyes on winning this one. I take it that means you’re trying to square up to shoot the headie with Johnnie Boy. Huh, good fucking luck! You honestly think it will be as easy as you’ve stated? You really believe you’re built like that? What because you won the International Championship your first time out?
Andy snickered beneath his voice.
Andy Donahue: I know somebody else who won the International Championship in his first match and guess what? He didn’t need some bitch to quit on the company and vacate it in order to win it. He just went to the ring, called his shot, and beat the piss out of the champion–that guy is Johnnie Cav. The same guy I would assume you plan on facing if you win this Ice Crown Rumble. Well, big guy, you can’t call your shots the way Johnie Boy did but if somehow you walk out of the Ice Crown as the guy who gets to challenge for any championship they want–I’m sure you’ll get the rude awakening of a lifetime when Johnnie finishes the job he started with that douchebag you all follow around.
Andy laughed as he cracked his knuckles.
Andy Donahue: I guess that’s what it all boils down to in the end. The CCPE boys and The Celtic Club boys–ready to do battle at the drop of a hat. Like the rappers say, when I see you it’s on sight. When Andy gets in the ring with J Mont in this battle royal–Andy Donahue is going to toss him around from corner to corner, pick him up like a little child and toss his little punk ass over the ropes and to the floor. Let him watch as his golden ticket to Johnnie Cav disappears into thin air. Shit, if all goes according to plan you’re gonna have to deal with Andy and Trig at the same damn time–what the hell are you and every other sack of shit in that rumble going to do then? How the hell do you guys plan on getting me over the top rope?
Andy slapped his quadriceps.
Andy Donahue: This potato eater got legs like tree trunks. If I don’t wanna move, then I ain’t moving and there ain’t a damn one of you clowns that are going to be able to tell me differently. I’m sure I’m about to hear twenty-eight different people run their mouths about how or why they’re going to win. What champion they’re aiming for, how this is going to be their career defining moment. Well….
Donahue clenched his fists into a ball and flexed his two massive arms.
Andy Donahue: The highlight of each of your 2022s is going to be when I wrap these boa constrictors around youse and squeeze the life out of you. Watch as that skin turns a few shades paler and then, when I’ve almost taken your life, that’s when I’ll finally show a bit of mercy and end your night. It doesn’t matter if it's J Mont, Caleb Scott, Fred Debonair, Ryan Hawkins, Max Stone, or any of you other cocksuckers that I haven’t heard of yet…you ain’t getting passed The Heir Apparent. I can view the Ice Crown Rumble as having three purposes–win it and prove my worth, get Trig and I a Tag Team Championship match and protect the World Championship all at the same time. These are the moments that define who the fuck we are! These are the moments that made me get involved with this sport! This is the kind of moment that I have been waiting for since the first time I stepped foot into a ring in the FCPW. This ain’t the end and it might not be the beginning of my story but this is the beginning of the next phase in Andy’s career. This is the beginning of my rise to the summit of the mountain. My mentor, the guy who’s been running my neighborhood since I was a little pup, he’s the apex predator on the food chain right now but one day…that spot is mine.
Andy paused for a moment and stared into the camera–the icy glare in his eyes showing just how serious he was about this event and his own future.
Andy Donahue: Now, I can’t be that wise ass bastard to say I’m chucking twenty-nine other people over the top rope because the luck of the Irish is on my side, I enter at twenty-three. So, while I may need to toss the next seven douchebags over the top rope…there’s no way for me to know how many of the so-called athletes in the back have already waved goodbye to their dreams. I’m just hoping my buddy Trigger is still in that ring when I make my way down there–just so we can deliver an ass beating together for the first time in a little bit. Johnnie been having a bit too much fun all by his lonesome in the World Championship scene, hell, last time he had a six man tag he had Eoin as one of his partners when he could have just as easily had myself or Trig. He told me it ain’t nothing to be worried about but I ain’t sitting back taking that shit lightly. O’Rourke is a cool cat, dude is bringing an added dimension to The Celtic Club, an extra set of fists but ya know what he’s also doing?
The weightlifting enthusiast smiled at the camera.
Andy Donahue: He’s lighting a fire under my ass! That’s a good thing for me and The Celtic Club, but it’s probably the worst thing that all of you other shitheads could have thrown at you. An athlete as well tuned as myself, as well trained as myself, who is finally beginning to get his head on straight. I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed but I am the strongest and that is a goddamn fact that ain’t nobody else in that Rumble going to be able to disprove. I’m sure most of you boys are sitting there shivering in your boots right about now. Ain’t nobody in the IIW ever seen Andy Donahue this determined, this is a new level of ambition that I haven’t even seen yet and to be honest with y’all…I get why you’re scared. There been plenty of you who have found yourselves in the ring with me or on the opposite side of a Celtic Club beat down–y’all know what this mick is capable of when he’s just having fun. Now imagine what this bastard from Hell’s Kitchen is capable of when he actually has his head screwed on tight.
Donahue waited for a moment as if someone was going to answer a question.
Andy Donahue: That’s right, y’all can’t imagine it or y’all just don’t want to. None of you knew how to take care of business against me before I had this little change of heart…I’d hate to see how the mighty crumble at my feet now. At Ice Crown, Andy Donahue takes it upon himself to right a few wrongs. The IIW been rejecting myself, Trig and Johnnie for over a year and a half now, like we’re some second class citizens that y’all are all stuck with. Well, you cocksuckers might be stuck with us but if y’all were smart enough you’d figure out a way to make the best of the new situation you find yourself in. The street kids are here and we are staring through the gates of your little country club. Let the kids from the streets into the country club and watch us flourish. Accept The Celtic Club as your own and watch the IIW take off like a fucking rocket ship heading to the Moon. It’s the people around here who have rejected us out of fear that once allowed this place to turn into a cesspool, and at the same time, it was us street kids who saved your precious country club from its own implosion. Now it’s time for Trig and Andy to do their part in writing the story of The Celtic Club’s dominance over the IIW. The time has come for Andy to step out from Johnnie and Trig’s shadow and get the job done when it counts and when it counts is the Ice Crown Rumble. It’s time for The Heir Apparent to be THE MAN. It’s time for The Celtic Club to have some Tag Team Gold. That time is the Ice Crown Rumble and unfortunately for all of you bastards that time just happens to be right around the corner.
The scene cut to static.
Andy Donahue: Ice Crown Rumble, win it. That’s all I heard, that’s all Johnnie told me I gotta do for The Celtic Club. So, what is Andy Donahue gonna do? I’m gonna enter that battle royal at number 23, sprint my ass down that ramp, slide into the ring and start throwing all them bitches around like a doll.
Andy smiled, he flexed his right arm exposing his veiny bicep.
Andy Donahue: Ain’t like y’all don’t already know that type of shit is light work for The Heir Apparent. Johnnie Cav hand picked me to be the guy to take over the torch at some point–it might not be right now but you can all rest assured that the day is coming. The day for Andy Donahue to be THE guy in The Celtic Club gets closer and closer with each passing day. And what do I gotta do to get me to that point? I can’t say for sure but I know that it starts with the Ice Crown Rumble.
Andy puffed up his chest and made his pecs dance for the camera.
Andy Donahue: We, as a Club, have our own goals. Johnnie said he’d win the World Championship and he did. We've been saying that those World Tag Team Championships belong to Trigger and myself and that is the exact reason why Johnnie took two of the spots for this battle royal and handed them off to us. Johnnie wants us to get the job done, we want to get the job done and that’s why every son of a bitch in that rumble gotta go up and over the top rope so that either Trigger or myself can make that challenge for those straps that, so far, have come so close but they’ve remained out of our reach It ain’t for a lack of trying, it just wasn’t our time yet. Now, though, I’ve got this feeling flowing through my veins and no it ain’t the pre-workout…that Lit AF gets me right though. This is finally OUR time, this is finally time for The Celtic Club to run wild on the IIW, it’s time for The Club to monopolize all of the top championships in this company.
Andy snorted as if he were a bull and held up a finger and with each of the following sentences he placed up another.
Andy Donahue: Johnnie as World Champion. Myself and Trigger as the World Tag Team Champions and just for shits and giggles, Eoin O’Rourke can take that International Championship from that douchebag J Mont. Oh yeah, speaking of that loud mouth, used tampon from the CCPE–I guess you’ve got your eyes on winning this one. I take it that means you’re trying to square up to shoot the headie with Johnnie Boy. Huh, good fucking luck! You honestly think it will be as easy as you’ve stated? You really believe you’re built like that? What because you won the International Championship your first time out?
Andy snickered beneath his voice.
Andy Donahue: I know somebody else who won the International Championship in his first match and guess what? He didn’t need some bitch to quit on the company and vacate it in order to win it. He just went to the ring, called his shot, and beat the piss out of the champion–that guy is Johnnie Cav. The same guy I would assume you plan on facing if you win this Ice Crown Rumble. Well, big guy, you can’t call your shots the way Johnie Boy did but if somehow you walk out of the Ice Crown as the guy who gets to challenge for any championship they want–I’m sure you’ll get the rude awakening of a lifetime when Johnnie finishes the job he started with that douchebag you all follow around.
Andy laughed as he cracked his knuckles.
Andy Donahue: I guess that’s what it all boils down to in the end. The CCPE boys and The Celtic Club boys–ready to do battle at the drop of a hat. Like the rappers say, when I see you it’s on sight. When Andy gets in the ring with J Mont in this battle royal–Andy Donahue is going to toss him around from corner to corner, pick him up like a little child and toss his little punk ass over the ropes and to the floor. Let him watch as his golden ticket to Johnnie Cav disappears into thin air. Shit, if all goes according to plan you’re gonna have to deal with Andy and Trig at the same damn time–what the hell are you and every other sack of shit in that rumble going to do then? How the hell do you guys plan on getting me over the top rope?
Andy slapped his quadriceps.
Andy Donahue: This potato eater got legs like tree trunks. If I don’t wanna move, then I ain’t moving and there ain’t a damn one of you clowns that are going to be able to tell me differently. I’m sure I’m about to hear twenty-eight different people run their mouths about how or why they’re going to win. What champion they’re aiming for, how this is going to be their career defining moment. Well….
Donahue clenched his fists into a ball and flexed his two massive arms.
Andy Donahue: The highlight of each of your 2022s is going to be when I wrap these boa constrictors around youse and squeeze the life out of you. Watch as that skin turns a few shades paler and then, when I’ve almost taken your life, that’s when I’ll finally show a bit of mercy and end your night. It doesn’t matter if it's J Mont, Caleb Scott, Fred Debonair, Ryan Hawkins, Max Stone, or any of you other cocksuckers that I haven’t heard of yet…you ain’t getting passed The Heir Apparent. I can view the Ice Crown Rumble as having three purposes–win it and prove my worth, get Trig and I a Tag Team Championship match and protect the World Championship all at the same time. These are the moments that define who the fuck we are! These are the moments that made me get involved with this sport! This is the kind of moment that I have been waiting for since the first time I stepped foot into a ring in the FCPW. This ain’t the end and it might not be the beginning of my story but this is the beginning of the next phase in Andy’s career. This is the beginning of my rise to the summit of the mountain. My mentor, the guy who’s been running my neighborhood since I was a little pup, he’s the apex predator on the food chain right now but one day…that spot is mine.
Andy paused for a moment and stared into the camera–the icy glare in his eyes showing just how serious he was about this event and his own future.
Andy Donahue: Now, I can’t be that wise ass bastard to say I’m chucking twenty-nine other people over the top rope because the luck of the Irish is on my side, I enter at twenty-three. So, while I may need to toss the next seven douchebags over the top rope…there’s no way for me to know how many of the so-called athletes in the back have already waved goodbye to their dreams. I’m just hoping my buddy Trigger is still in that ring when I make my way down there–just so we can deliver an ass beating together for the first time in a little bit. Johnnie been having a bit too much fun all by his lonesome in the World Championship scene, hell, last time he had a six man tag he had Eoin as one of his partners when he could have just as easily had myself or Trig. He told me it ain’t nothing to be worried about but I ain’t sitting back taking that shit lightly. O’Rourke is a cool cat, dude is bringing an added dimension to The Celtic Club, an extra set of fists but ya know what he’s also doing?
The weightlifting enthusiast smiled at the camera.
Andy Donahue: He’s lighting a fire under my ass! That’s a good thing for me and The Celtic Club, but it’s probably the worst thing that all of you other shitheads could have thrown at you. An athlete as well tuned as myself, as well trained as myself, who is finally beginning to get his head on straight. I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed but I am the strongest and that is a goddamn fact that ain’t nobody else in that Rumble going to be able to disprove. I’m sure most of you boys are sitting there shivering in your boots right about now. Ain’t nobody in the IIW ever seen Andy Donahue this determined, this is a new level of ambition that I haven’t even seen yet and to be honest with y’all…I get why you’re scared. There been plenty of you who have found yourselves in the ring with me or on the opposite side of a Celtic Club beat down–y’all know what this mick is capable of when he’s just having fun. Now imagine what this bastard from Hell’s Kitchen is capable of when he actually has his head screwed on tight.
Donahue waited for a moment as if someone was going to answer a question.
Andy Donahue: That’s right, y’all can’t imagine it or y’all just don’t want to. None of you knew how to take care of business against me before I had this little change of heart…I’d hate to see how the mighty crumble at my feet now. At Ice Crown, Andy Donahue takes it upon himself to right a few wrongs. The IIW been rejecting myself, Trig and Johnnie for over a year and a half now, like we’re some second class citizens that y’all are all stuck with. Well, you cocksuckers might be stuck with us but if y’all were smart enough you’d figure out a way to make the best of the new situation you find yourself in. The street kids are here and we are staring through the gates of your little country club. Let the kids from the streets into the country club and watch us flourish. Accept The Celtic Club as your own and watch the IIW take off like a fucking rocket ship heading to the Moon. It’s the people around here who have rejected us out of fear that once allowed this place to turn into a cesspool, and at the same time, it was us street kids who saved your precious country club from its own implosion. Now it’s time for Trig and Andy to do their part in writing the story of The Celtic Club’s dominance over the IIW. The time has come for Andy to step out from Johnnie and Trig’s shadow and get the job done when it counts and when it counts is the Ice Crown Rumble. It’s time for The Heir Apparent to be THE MAN. It’s time for The Celtic Club to have some Tag Team Gold. That time is the Ice Crown Rumble and unfortunately for all of you bastards that time just happens to be right around the corner.
The scene cut to static.