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Post by Osh Vaughan on Feb 22, 2021 1:09:26 GMT
vs Special Guest Referee – The New Commissioner Chino has taken no time in throwing his power about, booking Dan Distoner against Stabby Joe and inserting himself as the special guest referee! After Chino and Jason Myers cost Dan the TV Title last week, there sure are gonna be some tempers flared
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Post by Benz on Feb 22, 2021 21:27:14 GMT
He’s not coming, back is he?
Stabby Joe is not pleased and when he is not pleased people normally get cut. On this exceedingly rare occasion that will not be the case. The object of his score is his long-time friend James
Beneveti, known better as Benz, the new (and first) IIW TV champion. Left to make a phone call with Joe’s illegally acquired phone and not come back. His other long-time friend Patrick PC McGee (no H by the way) sits next to him on a dingey sofa that is covered in cigarette burns and Campbells finest Tommy soup. Only an idiot would choose to live in a place like this.
PC: Fu@k it lets get a Maccies, I saw one just past Strangeways, wish I could pop back in and visit me old pals. Had some good times in dere.
A short while later the duo having brought and paid for a couple of Big Mac meals of the McDonalds on Queens Road have taken their food a few short streets away to the Irish World Heritage Centre as PC insistence. He is Irish after all. His large Scottish friend doesn’t care where he sits as long as he can eat.
Joe: I don’t like it *munch munch* Benz is like a magpie, anything shiny and he loses focus. First the TV title and now whoever that was on the phone… the voice * chew slop* I know it from somewhere.
Like the psycho he is PC dips his chips in his strawberry milkshake. He sighs and shakes his head.
PC: He always gets his head straight in the end dere Joe. Yer need to focus on yer match. Me and thee are as experienced at this wrestling lark as most. Sure, we’ve been fighting since our mammie’s birthed us but dese boys in IIW can fioght like dem UFC boys mixed wiv dem circus fella in der tights.
A final bite finishes the Big Mac. It didn’t look so big in the hand of the gargantuan Stabby Joe.
Joe: DiStoner is no trapeze artist or MMA fighter. He’s like us, he swings fer the fences and keeps getting back up. That Jonny C guy busted him up pretty good a couple of weeks back but that didn’t stop him. He just taped himself up and kept going.
Neither one of us are as young as we used ta be, and I’m a damn site bigger than him. Still…. I don’t know pal; I don’t want to get caught up in his $hit with Chino. They have history that much is clear, I just don’t wanna get involved. I’m here to fight, get money and get off the streets. I don’t need a mansion just four walls and a roof. Maybe we could take some of the poor fu@kers we just walked past with us.
PC doesn’t answer he is busy. Nope there are no more fries in the carton, tipping it upside down wont help. Satisfied there are no salty potato pieces left PC snaps back to reality (ope there goes gravity).
PC: I don’t get it why don’t we jus’ get drunk like the old days. Sure, ya not as precise but you can’t feel it when they hit ya back
Ever the voice of reason Paddy McGee shows why he is not Micky Goldmill to Joe’s Rocky.
Joe: We discussed this, I thought being on your meds would help your memory Patrick. Its in our contract we have to stay out of jail. If we’re locked up, we can wrestle or do public appearances. ‘Sides it feels good to have a clear head once in a while. Maybe next week things will change, and we’ll be drunk fools again who knows.
PC: True pal, even our accents seem ta change week ta week its strange. Not as strange as the pale faced commish Chino. He’s the special ref in yer match an’ that Jason Myers fella won’t be far off He sounds like he’s straight outta a horror movie.
The conscientious Scot dumps his waste in the bin then gestures for his friend to hurry up.
Joe: Myers cannae keep his nose out if he don’t wanna get hit with me Machete. I fight fair. Chino may be the boss but he better do his job or he might get the Beheadening. Screw it I cannae focus. We need to find Benz.
PC: Maybe he’ll have some of that champagne he mentioned,
Joe: Champagne!!!! Fu@k that’s who it was!!!
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Post by Dan DiStoner on Feb 24, 2021 0:48:48 GMT
In the overturned locker room of Dan Distoner and sister MJ. The siblings are seen polishing off a bottle of Jack Daniel's as Dan rolls a joint. DiStoner is lousy venting his displeasure over being screwed out of the Television Title by old rivals Jason Myers and Chino.
DISTONER: That no good Mexican piece of shit Mother fuckin cock sucker. Not only did Chino distract me during my TITLE match. But he brings with him Jason Fucking Myers to attract me and cost me a championship. Then he books himself as ref for my next match. What the fucking fuck. What Chyno the Vagino have up his sleeve next.....Matt Robinson? Seifer Black? Ryan Omega? Hell bring em all. Bring that bitch Rayne too. I mean half the locker room in NWA had her. May as well go thru IIW's Roster too. I mean shit. I bet even Katie had her back in the day. Considering her daughter's middle name is Rayne.
Greg. I'm gonna be real with you. These idiots in the crowds know you as Chino. But I know you as Greg. And since I don't give a shit. I'm going to call you whatever I want. So Gregory. My old friend. I'm gonna be nice and give you a warning. If you don't call my match. Right down the middle. Then what you saw me do to Benz on Monday night. Is gonna seem like a vacation. Because if you get in my way. I don't care about friendship when we stand in the ring. And I will be forced to hurt you. And hurt you bad. But then again M.J. here could do that herself.
M.J. sparks the now fully rolled joint. As her and Dan sit there and smoke it. Dan throws the empty bottle against the wall.
Distoner: Jason Myers. Jason "Motherfucking" Myers. Where in the fuck have you been hiding for the last decade. I mean I have a good excuse for walking away from the business. What's yours? Couldn't handle being the Janetty of the Lords of Darkness? So you tuck tail and go home. Only to come back and interrupt my return to glory. I'll tell you what Jase. I've heard whispers. That you signed a contract. So Jase. What do you say. IIW has a Pay Per View coming up. And since I don't have a championship to defend. You wanna come attack me from behind. Come do it to my face bitch. Let's see what u got when your opponent sees the attack coming. Imagine it Jase. Jason Myers vs Dan Distoner headlines the first IIW PPV.
Now in my upcoming match. With that douche Chino as the ref I face Stabby Joe. This mother fucker looks like Ronald McDonald had an affair with a 300 pound bag of horse shit. Then fed it steroids. But damn man. Do you have to smell so much like your momma?
MJ starts laughing hysterically.
Stabby Joe. Your boy Benz knows what happens when you step in the ring with me. I suggest you take some pointers. Because I'm not distracted by Jason Myers. Or Chino for that matter. Because in my eyes. Both of them will be standing on the ring with me. Meaning I am going to use you. To send Myers a message. And if Chino gets involved . I'm going to beat his ass too.
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Post by Benz on Feb 27, 2021 17:01:02 GMT
Oh, thou demon drink, thou fell destroyer; thou curse of society, and its greatest annoyer. What hast thou done to society, let me think? I answer thou hast caused the most of ills, thou demon drink. ~ William McGonagall Dark, dingy and dirty. The very definition of a dive bar. During the national lockdown you don’t have many choices. The music is played on such an outdated system its barely audible. All kinds of freaks shamble around, their movements impaired by god knows what. Although its likely god would stay away from this place and leave it to his fallen angel. At the end of wooden bar two men sit. Two men who would normally be unwelcome in any bar. Two men who would normally the strangest in the room are but two of its patrons. Patrick “PC” McGee sups at Guinness, it’s not as fresh on the ones he drank in his younger days fresh from the brewery. His drinking companion Joseph “Stabby Joe” Burns has a bottle of scotch whiskey and a single glass, he pours two fingers in at a time. PC: We’ve been in Manchester about a month and you never told me about this place. I still don’t get it.
Joe: We didn’t have the money, and besides I couldn’t bring Benz here, they would never trust anyone outside of the Isles, even a Canadian. They only let you in because you’re with me.
PC: and you only got in because you took part in the bum fights, you’ve already told me that part. Over the years we’ve shared so many stories and you never told me you were part of an underground fighting ring that served such great Guinness. A quick slurp of his drink leaves McGee with a white moustache that he licks off. Joe necks another two fingers while tracing his finger over the carvings in the bar top. Joe: It was a different time, I – I was a different person. A man died in my last fight. He had some pretty important sponsors; I was advised to move on for fear of reprisal.
PC: Ummm then why are we here, these sorts of people have long memories.
Joe: I don’t care… there’s no point in avoiding the inevitable. People are c*nt$ at least people will stab you in the front not the back. Even my opponent at Mayhem looks you in the eye when he makes threats. Threats he is incapable of delivering on of course.
PC: He did insult yer mammie and yer pa, so we k now he at least is 14 years old.
Joe: Me mammie was a whore and me pa a drunk, but we know Joe only you can insult yer own. I’ve been mocked fer me red hair me whole life, the Ronald McDonald line wasn’t original 30 years ago and it means a lot less coming from a middle-aged pot head who’s only friend is his sister.
Ever the gentleman PC McGee makes a shapely figure which he then motor-boats. Joe tosses his glasses aside and necks directly form the bottle. He wipes his spittle on his sleeve. Joe: Dan DiStoner has overlooked me, actually its worse, he’s looked past me to Jason Myers and Chino. I’m 6’7”, 300lbs with red hair, I’m not easy to ignore but I guess THC helps.
Underestimate me Danny Boy, ask the ghosts in this place what happens when yer do that. A wideboy dripping in cheap looking gold does a double take as he walks past. He rests a hand cautiously on Stabby Joe’s shoulder. He has a pint in the other sloshing it everywhere. Joe? Is that you Joe yer big bastard, well fuck me sideways, it is you. My mince pies do not deceive me. Strike me dahn I never thought id clap me peepers on you again. Have yer come to fight? I can get you in if you want. The odds might not be great after this time but that means easy money. C’mon my son lets do this.
- - - - - - - - Slo-mo of Stabby Joe’s face getting hit opens. He spits blood on the mat and wipes his mouth on his wrapped hand. His opponent calls for him to come on and fight. The baying crowd join him. On the wall Joe names is written with 100/1 next to it. His opponent “Darius” is 1/3 favourite. Darius is shorter than Joe but much thicker. His dark skin glistens with sweat from his earlier fights. The reigning champ stays on until he loses. Darius: Not much of a f@king legend are yah. So, what if you killed a man bruv. My gat has taken out fools all over the borough. A right, left, hook combo lands hard. Joe doesn’t even try to dodge or block. At ringside PC is stood with the wideboy, who Joe identified as Dave. Dave: Why the f@ck ain’t he fighting? Why sign up and just stand there. I’ve put a ton on this. If he wins, I get a place in Marb’s for Lucy and the kids.
PC: We speak the same language, yet I have no idea what you said. For some reasons he’s stopped caring. I told you both this was a bad idea. Let me get in there.
Dave: No way bruv those geezers have shooters. If you stop a fight all money goes back to the punters. That will cost the firm a pretty penny and they will not be happy. PC: I understood most of that and I don’t want to die. Come on Joe hit the fecker Body shoots rock Joe, sending him to a knee. Darius half shucks and jives, not really having the flexibility to copy his idol. Darius: You’re a pussy bruv. No wonder ya Boy Benz did one, yeah that right I know who you are. I got me uncles Netflix. An’ when I take you out maybe I can get a match. Joe stands up right, his mood silences the arena. His rage is palpable. PC digs in his pockets for any money he can muster. PC: Where do I place a bet on Joe Dave: With only grunts of rage escaping Joe’s mouth, he fires back. Blow after blow rains down on the defending champ Darius. He tries to return fire but can’t take as good as he gives. The crowd are all a gape. They never believe in the legend of Big Red Joe, the few that bore witness were ignored as story telling old fools. Time seems to stand still as Joe winds up as Darius staggers back. Joe finally lets out one word as he lands the winning punch. Dwaaaaaaayne
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Post by Dan Distoner on Mar 3, 2021 5:23:49 GMT
They say I'm cocky. And I say what. It ain't bragging mother fucker. If you back it up.
Robert James Ritchie
A match is going on in the IIW Arena between local talents Richard Liss and Peter Puffer, when Because I got high plays on the PA System. Red and Green Pyro goes off and a giant cloud of smoke comes out of the stage.
Thru the smoke comes Dan Distoner with two glass bongs in his hands. He struts down the aisle to a chorus of boos and sets the bongs on the ring steps. And drags the referee out of the ring. Knocking him out cold with a punch to the temple.
Distoner proceeds to slide into the ring knocking Liss down with a clothesline and levels Puffer with a running knee lift. With both locals down Distoner grabs the bongs. Smashing one over each man's head. Before lifting them up one after another and hitting them with a Cash Out. Gets back to his feet. And gets a microphone from a ring attendant.
DISTONER: Someone needs to come out here. And get these Bums out of my ring. Ya know. Since I came back to the ring. All I have been in the ring with. Is a bunch of bums.
Jonny C..... Anthony Phoenix Benz
And this week Another certified bum Sloppy...I mean Stabby Joe.
Makes me wonder what kind of promotion Osh and Greggie are running here. Out of those names I said. Only one has a grain of talent and I'm sad to say. That's Jonny C.
Now this week I face Sloppy....fuck I mean Stabby Joe. Keep doing that. I don't know why. Now Stabby. I warned you a few days ago. To take a few pointers from your boy Benz. Because when I am in this ring. I am in my own zone. And I take no prisoners. Yeah Joe. I am still that cocky son of a bitch I was in my younger days. And 10x as tough. I don't really care that you are 6'8 and 300 pounds. Because the bigger they are. The harder they fall. Joe I have earned the right to be cocky. Because I can back up my words. With my actions. Yeah I said I would win the TV title a few weeks ago. But was attacked by Jason Myers. And didn't make it to my feet in time to stop your boy Benz from pinning Phoenix. Yes I technically lost in that match. But didn't take the pin fall. Not only that. But I left Benz laying in a heap in the middle of this very ring. If you look closely at the mat. It's still stained in that bums blood. And come Monday night. I am going to stain it some more with yours. And if need be Greggie or as you know him Chino.
Now everyone. I know Chino better than most. Our careers have been intertwined since The Insane Asylum. Thru our years in NWA. And even when I was enjoying my retirement. He has been a friend and an enemy. But for the entire time I have known him.
He has always been
An Asshole.
Ladies and Gentlemen. Let me tell you what kind of man. That the IIW Commissioner really is. When he bought NWA. He had Jonny Diamond fire me by mail. Before he would cut the check. Forced me to fight him personally for my contract when I was healthy enough to return to the ring. And even to the point of when given a bottle of blue pills for free. Was making money selling them to talent on the side.
Now I never personally bought them or needed them. The "Distoner Boner" still has no problem giving a fine piece of ass a standing ovation.
But for a man to make profit off the boys. For something he got for free.
Greg.....that's a total dick move.
With that. Distoner drops the microphone and exits the ring.
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